You know...I fail to see why sexual preference has _anything_ to do with gaming. I'm a white male middle-class 30-something christian engineer heterosexual husband father brother son veteran paintball-playing star-gazing hockey-playing gamer cook carpenter etc. etc. etc. Not one of those things has a wit to do with any other (except maybe the father/husband part...although in 21st centuary America, not necessarily)
I have two other hobbies that are not exactly main stream: Paintball and Astronomy. Astronomy certainly has a bit of a "geek" aura about it (although I find most people still see it as somewhat cool and fascinating) and paintball probably has a worse image than D&D currently has. When I mention D&D to none gamers sure, I get comments like "Isn't that that Satanic game?" but those comments are almost invariably jokes. In my circles (and I know quite a few fundamentalist Christians), no one really believes that playing make-believe is the path to Hell. I've been playing D&D since 1979 and even at the height of the satanic fervor in the mid 80s, very few people I knew really believed there was any problem with playing the game and most of the hype was from a very vocal minority, or so it seemed to me.
When I mention paintball, some people become down right uncomfortable, almost as if I'm going to go "postal" and start blowing people away. In fact, a friend of mine who plays was reported to his manager as a possible violence risk at work specifically because he plays! Paintball players are seen as delinquent teen agers or right-wing fanatics who play "war" to train to over throw the government or some such. Parents seem far more likely to not allow their kids to play paintball out of fear of the militaristic aspects of the game than to not allow them to play D&D...(in fact, my boss is interested in bringing his son to play paintball but said his wife doesn't like the idea of the kid playing with guns!
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But just like with D&D, I patiently explain away people's ignorant fears and misconceptions whenever I can and have organized both D&D games and paintball outings for my friends and coworkers. Some of them have even converted (in fact, three members of my current group of gamers were recruited from my non-gaming coworkers). One of the guys I regularly play paintball with took part in one of the outings I organized.
My point is, gamers are no more or less a non-mainstream group than any other. Threads like this have lead me to believe that many gamers consider themselves to be part of some sort of victimized and oppressed minority. When you are denied a job or a place to live or a seat in a restaurant or forced to the back of the bus because you are carrying a PHB THEN you'll have a point. I think many people actually seek out victim status...it is just as much a part of the "us vs. them" mentality as the reverse.
I like the one POV early in this thread: the writer said he's a gamer who happens to be gay. If you define yourself primarily by your out-of-step interests and activities, then people will treat you as if you are out-of-step (duh?). If the only thing I talked about at work was D&D, then my coworkers would (rightly) think I was socially retarded.
Just as you're free to make non-mainstream choices, others are free to not accept it or like it. IMO, that's a GOOD thing (FREEDOM BABY! Yeah!). It is human nature to distrust that which is unfamilliar...lamenting that fact is about as useful as lamenting the weather.
Just my opinion. Not meant to flame anyone....
