Iron DM 2010: All Submissions and Judgments

[ender_wiggin]

Storms Upon the Waste

Introduction
A swirl of sand kicks up at the boy. He tries to keep the two heavy buckets, brimming with precious water, balanced on his shoulders. The sand stings, forces him to turn his head, close his eyes, and threatens to topple him. A small bead of sweat hangs for an instant like a necklace jewel on his chin. The boy catches the drop in his right bucket; a victory.

To the north, the boy can see the city – Oasis – where the water is spun from a magnificent magical wheel. A relic, the monks say, from before the cataclysm. Times are growing better, with the Monastery’s hard work finally paying off, but five hundred gallons per day is still not enough – not nearly enough – to feed the thirsty bodies of everyone in the desert, and the bloody war for relics and resources grows more fierce each day.

With the setting sun, the faint spark of mana synapses are visible from far above. Random bursts of elemental energy – fire, ice, lightning – dot the evening sky. There will be a storm tonight, a reminder to all that the cataclysm was not just an explosive catastrophe brought on by their ancestors, but a tragedy that will haunt them for centuries to come. The boy hurries.

Synopsis
The Wasteland is a mess. Some 80 years ago, a promising golden age ended with a massive arcane cataclysm that ripped through the land, leveling cities and plunging all of civilization into a dark age. Now, intermittent mana storms rip through the area, arcane is sought after and hoarded, and ruthless violence invades every corner of the desert. A population of centaurs, possessing both cunning and mobility, rule the fringes of the Wasteland. Without stable resources, they raid and pillage from the humanoid settlements. Many stand against this horde and are defeated. Those rare warriors that achieve victory against the vicious marauders are heroes.

Driven by the most base of human motivations, the Wasteland is one large den of sin. In this lawless place, misogyny runs rampant. Women are bought and sold as commodities; men of power are wed to many wives. Fertility is a woman’s most powerful and oftentimes only asset. And yet there is hope. The Monastery, a detached but largely philanthropic organization, collects and studies pre-cataclysmic arcane in hopes of revitalizing the land. To keep their artifacts safe from the mana storms and from marauding hooves, the Monastery has holed up in a pre-cataclysmic bunker. Though socially aloof, the Monastery has already proven to be beneficial; one artifact is now being utilized as a massive clean water generator. Its presence gave rise to the first post-apocalyptic city – named Oasis.

But men travel to Oasis for more than water. The Sanctum, a combination brothel and woman-trafficking institution, is a popular destination. Though owned by a man, most of the Sanctum’s activities are overseen by the owner’s eldest and only surviving wife, the Matron Khalilah, an efficient and enigmatic manager. One of her most important tasks is the education of outgoing girls: how to act, how to speak, how to eat. Unbeknownst to all, however, she secretly teaches them to defend themselves in face of domestic violence, hoping to grant some empowerment to her beleaguered gender. The measure is usually successful.

In this adventure, the players are placed in the middle of a scandal: one of Khalilah’s girls has murdered a prominent centaur slayer. Are they willing forego all sense of justice or retribution in order to obtain what they desire?

Tentative Adventure Outline
0. Hook
1. Hazards of the Waste
2. The Monastery
3. Sanctuary
4. Outcomes

Hook
The players need an artifact. It could be a variety of such; an extremely rare ingredient needed for a ritual, a weapon to help combat a demon, a key to unlock some greater agenda. Ideally, this item is highly desired yet not absolutely essential to the advancement of the greater campaign – thus, the players may later find the donation of the item a difficult but morally superior alternative.

In any case, their search for this item brings them to Oasis; more specifically a place called the Vault, where monks collect and study artifacts with the hope of unlocking their power for the benefit of civilization.

For the purposes of this adventure, the variable desired item is called the Hook.

Note: perhaps the Wasteland encompasses the entire setting or is only a part of it. If the latter, the players, though perhaps powerful, are not masters of the arcane enough to provide more than minor insights into the mysteries of the relics.

Hazards of the Waste
The first day or so in the Wasteland is a good opportunity to introduce the centaur threat by throwing the PCs into an ambush from these monstrous denizens.

Before they recover from the ambush, the players are beset by a powerful mana storm. Read the following:
An immense bang snaps at the air less than ten feet above you. Your ears are deafened briefly, and when you look up, you see pinpricks of light flashing underneath the clouds. Perhaps struck by the beauty of this phenomenon, you stop and watch, until a second synapse engulfs your party in green flames.

The pain is fleeting; you’ve felt worse. But while batting at your sleeves, you see another fireball a hundred feet to the west, and then a small tornado of what looks like ice kick up sand to the north. A searing pain at your belt interrupts any communication. You look down to see a vial, glowing hot, the viscous liquid inside beginning to boil…

The storm wreaks havoc on the party’s magical items and equipment. They are shown the power of such a storm in a skill challenge.

• Complete Success: They are able to protect all of their consumable magic items.
• Complete Failure: They lose all of their consumables and some minor magical items.
• Partial Success: They lose some of their consumables and minor magic items. In any case, the storm eventually threatens to overwhelm the group. Luckily, they are rescued and introduced to Farad Hukem, a local patriarch with a deep understanding of the Wasteland.

Farad is kind and helpful, but also shows signs of mourning. If inquired, he will tell them of his older brother Zahid. Zahid was the eldest and favorite son of his illustrious father, and the bearer of the family heirloom: a golden torc that smelled of ancient magic. The torc, sometimes called the “Centaur Slayer,” was typically given to the most promising young warrior when he reached adulthood. For three generations, the Slayer had brought the Hukem family fame and fortune, for they had been instrumental in holding back the marauding centaur hordes. Farad, like many of his brothers, now makes a living off of protecting the relatively vulnerable Wasteland families from intermittent centaur raids. Tragically, however, Zahid was murdered less than two weeks ago. At this point, Farad grows quiet.

If the party convinces Farad to share with them the details via a brief diplomatic skill challenge or good roleplaying, he will reveal sadly: Zahid had recently purchased a ninth wife from Oasis. Zahid was found dead the morning after the wedding. His arm had been severed and there was a tiny needle mark in his neck. Perhaps more disconcertingly, the Centaur Slayer had been taken. The wife had disappeared. He offers a substantial monetary reward for the recovery of the Slayer and relates his own determination in bringing the killer to justice.

Note: mechanically, the Centaur Slayer occupies the arm slot and offers some offensive combat enhancements and also provides some bonuses to charisma-based skills (which probably helped the Hukem family attain their fortune).

Regardless of how much information the party got out of Farad, they are eventually pointed in the right direction: the Monastery in Oasis and the Vault it guards. Farad will accompany them to Oasis with a number of soldiers in search of the torc himself unless he tasked the PCs with recovering it.

If the party is restless or is amenable to martial encounters, feel free to throw another centaur encounter at them; only this time, they are witness to the ruthlessness and brutality with which the Hukem fights.

Oasis
Upon entry into Oasis, read the following:
You pass a boy carefully hauling water away from the city to his home. A batch of dirty weeds grows at his feet, looking aberrant in the desert sand. Up ahead, a long line of women and children meander across city grounds. You turn a corner and find the head of the line at a ten foot wheel, made from some obsidian material, spinning in the air and ejecting clear water that materializes within its radius. Faint yellow sigils glow periodically on the side of the object. The wheel itself is held five feet in the air by a ramshackle system of wooden stilts. There are wheels at the contraption’s base, and several monks keep tabs on the crowd and on the sky, ready to move at the first sign of a storm.

The Monastery, which protects the vault, is situated on the side of a cliff face just on the outskirts of the city; the building is the only gate to a cavernous space within the cliff the monks call the Vault. The Vault is a pre-cataclysm structure somehow shielded from the mana storms that shred through other unprotected magicks; it is a safe hiding place for the Monastery’s relics and is the site of their research. Since the advent of their Water Wheel, the Monastery had received significant positive public attention. A number of the city’s denizens visit the Monastery each day to pray. They are given the antechamber of the building for this purpose, but are not allowed any further.

Mentioning the Hook grants the players a private audience with Brother Samir, one of the ranking monks. Samir is cold and calculated. He rejects the notion of just giving the PCs what they want; the people of the Wasteland depend on their diligent research and the distant objectives of this group of adventurers is surely not important enough to warrant relinquishing such an important item. However, he will offer the PCs a trade: the Monastery has sought the Hukem Family Torc for some time now, believing it to be a powerful pre-cataclysm artifact and an important piece of their continued education. Samir is unaware of the object’s recent theft, though he doesn’t seem turned away by less-than-honest methods of obtaining the relic if that subject is broached.

Note: though more bloodthirsty players might find it a good idea, a direct assault on the Monastery is very unlikely to be successful. Both the building and the Vault are magically protected and trapped. In addition, the monks here are trained martially, possess superior magical armaments, and are prepared to fight for every square inch of their turf. If the DM sees this ploy coming, he should try to hint to the players that this likely to be an unfruitful idea.

Sanctuary
A complex investigative urban skill challenge will reveal the following about the location of the Hukem Torc, in addition to what the PCs may already have learned from Farad.

• Complete Failure: Zahid Hukem was recently murdered; found death with his arm severed. The suspected killer is his newly purchased wife, though she is missing. The players gain a detailed physical description of the girl.
• Partial Success: In addition to the above, the cause of death was suspected by poison delivered by a slim piece of bone. A slave girl named Mujita, recently wed to Zahid was seen in town again about a week ago. She returned to the Sanctum, where she had been purchased, and hasn’t been seen for about a week. Rumors say she’s carrying magic.
• Complete Success: In addition to the above, Zahid Hukem, the owner of the artifact, was killed about two weeks ago. The cause of death was suspected to be a lethal poison delivered by a stiletto made from the tooth of a poisonous beast. The stiletto was seen used as a hairpin by Mujita.

Entrance to the Sanctum is limited by money. The players can front the cost themselves, though if they share the results of their investigation with Farad, he will fund their entry and accompany them. Either way, Farad has been conducting his own investigation and is not far behind him. If the players enter the Sanctum by themselves, Farad will enter soon after them.

An examination of the girls currently being offered by the Sanctum will reveal that Mujita is absent amongst them. If looking for a bony hairpin, about four of the girls are seen carrying the object. If the players pay for private time with any of the women, they have the option of instigating another skill challenge.

• Complete Failure: the girl reveals nothing, but instead runs from the room screaming of violence.
• Partial Success: the girl hints at Khalilah’s culpability in the matter, but grows silent out of loyalty.
• Complete Success: the girl explains that Khalilah is a motherly figure, and that she is only protecting her wards. She taught them self defense against the unruly men that paid for them, and gave them the means to do it, a subtle weapon locked in their hair. Mujita, she explains, is barren, as are many of the girls in the Sanctum. Possessing little or no value, these girls have no choice but to work in the Sanctum. The girl begs them to find mercy within their hearts.

If approached, the matron of the girls, Khalilah, will deny harboring the girl. Insightful players may suspect that she is lying, and perceptive ones will see her wispy gray hair held together by a bony hairpin. Khalilah has the welfare of Mujita at heart and will trade the Torc for a promise of silence. If the players do not mention the Torc, try to subdue or attack Khalilah, or otherwise provoke violence, Khalilah will attempt to render the nearest opponent unconscious with her hairpin needle and flee into the back rooms. She will collect Mujita and attempt to escape. If desperate and cornered, she will offer the artifact in exchange for their lives. Any peaceful outcome, however, is complicated by Farad’s involvement.

If Farad is with them, he will be outraged and embarrassed that his brother’s murderer was indeed a woman. He and his men will turn violent immediately and tear the place apart in search of revenge. This engagement will be a massacre of the Sanctum unless the PCs stop him.

If Farad is not with them but in the building, he will piece together the truth in short time. The PCs have a brief opportunity to avoid bloodshed by extremely clever play but again, the situation will otherwise turn violent. If Farad suspects the PCs have helped harbor Mujita or take the Torc for themselves, he will attack them.

If Farad has hired the PCs (and is thus not in town), this gives them a somewhat longer window to avoid bloodshed should they wish. Farad will still expect the Torc to be returned, however, and he will inquire the full extent of their journey when they return.

Should the PCs enter a combat with Farad, they can capitalize on their previously friendly interaction with him via a skill challenge. Each success should hold Farad at bay for a round, while each failure eats up their action economy during combat.

Outcomes
There are several ways in which the adventure can end.

If the PCs do not give Farad the Torc, he will eventually find the PCs and attack them. Future centaur threats become increasingly damaging and the Wasteland suffers from it.

If Farad does recover the Torc, the PCs have gained a powerful new ally. Farad will continue to seek revenge for his brother’s murder, and will eventually find Mujita unless the PCs have intervened to prevent that. The PCs must either forfeit their Hook or find another way to barter with the Monastery.

If Mujita is spared, Khalilah becomes a potential future ally.

If the Monastery acquires the Torc, they make headway in their research, and their community visibly benefits from it if the PCs ever return. Also, the Monastery becomes a potential ally, offering shelter within the Vault whenever a mana storm erupts in the area.

The PCs gain brief access to the Vault while delivering the Torc:
You don’t notice the hum until you are almost at its door, but thinking back, you realize that it was faintly audible from even outside the monastery. The Vault’s walls are natural rock, and every inch of it is covered in unintelligible sigils. They say the sigils glow and flicker when a storm erupts outside, a myriad of whites and reds and yellows. When your eyes finally see past the cavern’s walls, you marvel at the sheer number of artifacts held in the room. Some sit on wooden tables, abandoned by the monks, while others are picked at by a half dozen. Some are enormous and stately, reaching almost the cavern's ceiling, while others are tiny and subtle, kept carefully in small jewelry boxes for fear that a breath would send them into a crevice. You can’t help but feel the monks here are nothing but apes prodding at something far beyond their comprehension, but perhaps even a monkey can occasionally learn how to work a doorknob or pour a drink. If they are lucky, they won’t kill themselves first.

Other Considerations: Handling Female PCs
(It is assumed that the serious themes and topics handled within this adventure are appropriate for the gaming group.) Female PCs have an especially interesting roleplaying potential within the setting. Though their entire gender is subjugated to extreme misogyny, foreign women that walk as equals amongst their companion males garner substantial respect in the presence of local men. They are symbols of rare power and are treated with a combination of suspicion, awe, and deference.

Ingredient Use
Centaur Hunter: Farad is a professional hunter of marauding centaurs and becomes (in the most probable case) the primary antagonist of the story. More imaginative interpretations include his brother, his profession at large, and the Torc itself in question.
Ancestral Grotto: The Vault, built by the land’s ancestors, is a cave protected by abjurative magic from the deleterious mana storms that destroy magic items.
Secretive Matron: Khalilah, the matron of the Sanctum, has a dangerous secret: she defies the dominance of man by training her servant girls to defend themselves. She, of course, keeps many other secrets as well.
Torc of Fortune: A pre-cataclysm artifact and family heirloom of the Hukem family, allowing its warriors to possess a combative edge against the marauding centaurs. It has brought fortune to its owner’s family for several generations.
Polygamy: in the ensuing chaos after the cataclysm, civilization returned to a more primitive time: both lacking and ruled by men (polygyny).
Bone Needle: Khalilah’s girls use a poison coated bone needle as a hairpin and as a weapon in times of desperation.

 

[Radiating Gnome]

In this match, a relatively tame set of ingredients creates the potential for a cloase match as quarterfinalist DMs try to produce a winning entry. We've got Alpha Centauri (AC) by Iron Sky, and Storms Upon the Waste (SUW), by ender wiggins.

Lets take a look at those ingredients!

Centaur Hunter

In SUW, Farad is a professional hunter of centaurs, a credible use of the ingredient . . . but the implementation seems a little troubled to me. Yes, he's a hunter of centaurs, but as far as the real story of the adventure is concerned, it could have been anything Farad hunts for a living -- Anhkegs or whatever. I liked the idea of centaurs as the nomadic raiders in this world, and I thought that was very well placed, but still . . . those early encounters with centaurs don't really connect with the whole story very well, they feel like they're there to justify Farad being a centaur hunter, and not perfectly integrated. It's good, just not great.

In AC, the whole adventure revolves around centaurs who are hunters -- Equus and Eurytion are two hunters vying for control over Equus's herd. Because the centaur-ness pervades the whole adventure, I find this use more complete and compelling. So, advantage AC.

Ancestral Grotto
AC presents the Barrow of Song, a pretty solid use of the ingredient. SUW, on the other hand, gives us the Vault, which works just about as well. No advantage here.

Secretive Matron
Again, I really like the use of secretive matrons in both adventures. No advantages here.

Torc of Fortune
This, from a pure stickler's point of view, is a misstep for SUW. It's a little one, but these competitors are pretty close, so small missteps may end up making big differences.

In AC, the Torc is a neckpiece once worn by an ancestor centaur, one that has a dramnatically powerful power to ensure good fortune. Pretty solid stuff.

In SUW, though, the Torc somehow becomes a bracer or armband of some sort. It's also named Centaur Hunter (a fairly ineffective attempt to double-cover the other ingredient -- just because I name my dog Obama doesn't make him president). I think it would have been better, for the sake of including the ingredients, to not transform the torc into another type of item. I suspect it seemed like a reasonable change to make, given that "torc" is an unusual word, but I don't think we would be satisfied with an entry that converted an ingredient that was "songbow" into "songsword" just because it makes more sense for the overall story for it to be a sword rather than a bow.

Anyway, advantage AC here.


Polygamy
I got confused, in a couple of places, with the way relationships, procration, and the basic herd polygamy works in AC. I get the basics -- a herd has an alpha hunter. He's the stallion, and by implication the other males that might travel with the herd don't mate with the females. I didn't find this explicitly stated, but implied. Also, the adventure states that the circle of matrons forbids the offspring of the chief hunter to replace him as chief . . . but if that's the case, why is it such a big concern that he may not be fertile? I think the first detail, probably -- if that were the case, then no chief would come from within his own herd, but would always be an outsider -- right? That confuses me. But, still, the polygamy is present, so it works.

In SUW, Polygamy exists as a sort of background element, but that's as far as it seems to go. Khalilah is the sanctum owner's "oldest and only surviving wife" -- so that polygamy is only a backdrop, and is not an important part of the story. So, even with it's minor confusion, the polygamy is more important and significant in AC, so it gets another advantage here.

Bone Needle
SUW uses the bone needle well, in an important way. Totally credible. But ... AC uses a bull's penis bone to make a needle that's used as a ritual focus for fertility rituals . . . and that's the one ingredient in the whole match that I've though was excellent and cool. So, one more advantage to AC.

So . . . overall, the ingredients are leaning towards AC pretty significantly.


Playability
I worry a bit about the playability of AC. Early on in the adventure, as the PCs are guided through all of the stuff that is already decided -- three of the 5 trials, etc . . . it's feels like the PCs are being pushed through a lot of exposition there. We finally get to the two tasks that they need to complete, but my sense is that the players need to have a way to connect to the other trials, or it's just more filler background that doesn't quite matter. I think it could have been much stronger if the players were a part of the whole trial, especailly those events they have no chance of winning.

SUW has less problem there -- the adventure is simpler, a murder investigation of sorts. The players get to play through most of the story, with the exception of the actual murder (which you have to have off screen for it to be a murder mystery . . .).

Another area where SUW has an advantage here is in it's flexibility. AC has one path for the PCs to follow -- they're going to go do their two things to help with the trials, and that's about it. But in SUW, the players have to make ambiguous plot decisions, and there is no right answer. Do they give the Torc to Farad, to restore his family's relic? Do they trade it to the monastery? Do they just keep it? In the end, for the players, gaming is about decisions, and the more levels we can give them decisions to make, the more interesting the game is for them. The decisions the players get to make in SUW are much more interesting than the ones they get to make in AC. There's a strong edge here for SUW.

Creativity.
One thing I didn't address much in the discussion of the ingredients is the way they all work together in the final creation. And that, I think, is what sets AC apart in the creativity department.

AC weaves the ingredients together well -- the bone needle is tied to the polygamy, for example, through the ritual used to promote fertility in Equus. I didn't find the same level of integration in SUW -- there the ingredients seem to exist for their own sake, and without such strong connections to the other ingredients. For example, there's the bone needle. Both adventures use the bone needle well. SUW even connects the bone needle to the secretive matron, but SUW threads the needle and the matron together, and then threads them into the polygamy by means of the ritual to promote fertility. They're both doing this, to some extent, but AC is doing it better.

I don't want to come down hard on either entry here -- there are things that I really liked about both entries -- I like the bedouin-centaur connection, something I wasn't expecting and it really made me sit up and notice. I was not expecting the polygamy-centaur connection, although it's a natural fit. I like a lot of the small details in both entries. But I think AC edges out SUW in this area.

Conclusion.

I liked both adventures. I'm one of the goobers who's pretty excited about the coming Dark Sun books, so I expected that SUW would have an advantage, at first glance, just based on that affinity. And AC is not without flaws -- as I said above, there were details of succession and breeding among the centaurs that was confusing to me, and I thought the adventure would be stronger if the PC were engaged in all five of the trials, instead of pushed along to the last two.

SUW has superior playability, which makes this a close decision. In the end, I think the stronger use of ingredients and an edge in creativity, Alpha Centauri is this round's winner, so Iron Sky advances.

-rg

 

[MatthewJHanson]

The Happiest Place on Earth
“The Happiest Place on Earth” is Call of Chuthlu adventure where the players take on the rolls of children between the ages of six and eleven. It may serve as a one-shot or a prologue to a future campaign.

Background
Uncle Matt works at Disneyland, and every year he takes all his nieces and nephews there for a weekend of fun and magic. Uncle Matt leads a cult dedicated to Yig, the Father of Serpents, and is planning a mass sacrifice for that weekend.

Uncle Matt and his fellow cultists planed to use a concert featuring Snoopy, the beloved Peanut’s character, to lure children in for sacrifice, but somehow they booked rapper Snoop Dogg instead.

Chapter 1: Fun with Uncle Matt
The adventure begins when the player characters (who are all cousins) are dropped off at Disneyland to stay with their Uncle Matt for the weekend. Uncle Matt warmly greets each child and assures that that they are going to have a “Ssswell time!”

Uncle Matt is an unobtrusive man in his late thirties. He wears glasses and has long hair that ties back in a pony tale. As a child he had a profound stutter, but now the only trace of it is that he elongated all of his “s” sounds. Uncle Matt has one daughter, Bianca, who is the apple of Matt’s eye. Matt and Bianca’s mother divorced when Bianca was young and every since Matt has spoiled her rotten.

Bianca, at twelve, is the oldest of the cousins and is big for her age. She has two sides different as night and day. When her father is around, Bianca is a sweet little girl. Though she is going through adolescents, she has retains many of the outward trappings of childhood, keeping her hair in pigtails, wearing pink dresses, and going on about ponies and princesses. When her father is not around, Bianca’s inner bully comes out. She uses threats, intermediation, psychological and physical violence to get her way.

Bianca’s bully side rears its head early in the adventure. Uncle Matt might buy ice-cream or candy for all of the kids, and Bianca might take candy from one of the youngest PCs and blame somebody else. Of course Uncle Matt knows that his “Sssweet little girl would never tell a fib.”

After spending the morning snacking on candy and going on rides, Uncle Matt brings the children to the Jungle Cruise. This Disney ride simulates a trip down jungle rivers of Africa, Asia, and South America, including animatronics animals. Nobody is surprised then, when a snake pops out of the water and sticks its head into the boat.

Until they realize that this is not another animatronics marvel. It is a real live python and its looking for lunch. Guests panic, the boat “driver” jumps overboard, and Bianca screams, “Daddy! Make it Stop!”

The player characters might get a few bruises or even break a wrist, but they are in no real danger from the snake. Uncle Matt quickly subdues and traps the snake. However he is livid at the ride operators. As a Disneyland worker himself, Matt knows exactly who to talk to, and shouts, “A live ssnake got into your park! Thiss isss unaccsssssseptable!”

In an effort to make up for the debacle, the park staff lets each child pick item from the Adventureland Bazaar (Bianca somehow ends up with two), and gives the whole family a free lunch at the Bengal Barbecue.

Uncle Matt tries to regain his composure. “Letss sssit down to eat a nicssse lunch,” he says, and let the PCs order anything they want (even eating dessert first!) As they eat, Uncle Matt suggests they see the concert that night at the Tomorrowland Terrace. Looking at a brochure he sees, “Ssnoopy Dog” and remarks that he loves that beagle.

“Daddy,” Bianca interrupts, “that’s not Snoopy Dog. That’s Snoop Dogg. He’s, like, a rapper for old people.”

Uncle Matt is again horrified. How could a family friendly place like this end up hosting an “unsssavory rapper?” He whips out his antique cell phone. It is the size of a brick and has a sticker of Donald Duck and Daisy Duck, but Daisy’s head has been wrapped off. Matt has a very loud very animated conversation with somebody on the other end of the phone, blaming them for the horrible mix up.

Uncle Matt must not have gotten the response he wanted, because he slams his phone down on the table. “Wait here until I get back,” Matt says to the characters, then storms away from the table. He slips through one of the concealed doors that lead to the bowls of the theme park, leaving his vegetarian chilidog half eaten.

Chapter 2: The Mouse, the Snake, and the Dogg.
It might take a minute or two for what just happened to sink in. The adult in charge of the player characters has left them alone with no supervision. If they do not figure it out, Bianca soon does and declares with a wicked grin, “With Daddy gone, I’m in charge!” Some PCs might want to wait for Uncle Matt to come back, but no matter how long they wait, Uncle Matt isn’t coming.

At this point the adventure opens up and the PCs are free to explore the park. Below are a few of the people or areas the children might encounter. Most of these have the possibility of something horrible happening to one of the children. Bianca should be the first child to go, and only after she has left should bad things happen to the PCs

More Rides
Being children, the PCs might take the opportunity to go on more rides. Some of them might run smoothly, but at some point, another snake mysteriously finds its way onto one of the rides. This time a small viper bites one of the children. The poisoned child starts having seizures and can barely breathe. Disneyland Staff rush the child away, and try to buy the silence of the other children with more park goodies.

Park Security
Some PCs might want to take the sensible route and ask a member of the park staff for help. If they do so, they are led to a small and boring (but surprisingly insecure) room. After waiting here for half an hour a park security officer asks to speak to the oldest child alone. After a few minutes the remaining children hear distant screams. The child never returns, but half an hour later the same security guard comes back and wants to speak to the next oldest child. This process repeats until the children escape, probably into the bowls of the park.

The Undercity
The children might try to follow Uncle Matt to the hidden “backstage” of the park, or they might find themselves lost there accidently after escaping from park security. There are several areas of interest that the kids can find backstage.

The Snake Pens
There children find a pen housing dozens of dangerous snakes. Several cases look like the recently held snakes, but are now empty. One of the cases houses the same python that attacked the children earlier, and it’s still hungry. The python breaks free of, and unless the children are quick, it swallows one of the kids. As the other children flee, they can still hear cries of help coming from within the snake’s gut.

Uncle Matt’s Cell Phone
The children can also find Uncle Matt’s cell phone in one of the tunnels beneath the park. There is now a single bloody handprint on the phone. If they try to call their parents, none of them answer, but if the PCs try the last two numbers dialed somebody picks up. When the characters try the most recent number dialed, the young woman who answers immediately apologizes for the mix up, but insists that the ritual can still go on as planned, and everything is read below Tomorrowland Terrace. When she realizes that Uncle Matt is not on the other end she demands to know, “Who is this?”

If they characters try to call the number before that, whatever picks up the phone speaks in a harsh hissing language that the children cannot understand. Listening for to long will damage the character’s sanity.

The Library of Yig
Underneath a more traditional library, the PCs come upon a library of occult lore. In particular the library contains every book mentioning the elder god Yig, Father of Serpents. Yig is powerful and quick to anger. He may send snakes to kill those who have wronged him, or turn them into half snake monsters. Left open on the table is a book of great power that describes both how to summon and dismiss a terrible servant of Yig. Any PC who reads the book risks going insane, but also learns valuable information that might come in useful in the future.

The characters can also use the books in the library to deduce that the ideal time to perform the ritual to summon the servant of Yig is tonight at eight o’clock, and the ideal place is the Tomorrowland Terrace.

The Cult Meeting
The children might be hiding in a closet of crawling through an air duct when they overhear a meeting spoken in hushed tones. The catch glimpses of people wearing robes that overshadow their faces. A man named Matthias seems to lead the meeting. He begins by praising Yig, who will lead them all to enlightenment and cleanse the world of their enemies. He then demands to know who accidently booked “Snoop Dogg” instead of “Snoopy the Dog.” He berates his underlings until finally one of them is forced to admit that Matthias himself made that mistake. At this point Matthias insists that they will have to make the best of the situation and that, “The ssscerimony will go on assss planned.”

Tomorrowland Terrace
If the children explore Tomorrowland Terrace before the concert that evening, they find two things of interest. First they find all of the supplies needed to complete the ritual of summoning described in the library of Yig (candles, incense, virgin blood, etc). Secondly they find a large supply of pyrotechnics that will be part of Snoop Dogg’s performance that night.

Snoop
Finally, the children might find their way into Snoop Dogg’s dressing room. Snoop’s bodyguard initially tries to shoo the children away, but Snoop insists on seeing them. Snoop tells the children how excited he is to be playing at Disneyland, and wonder’s if he’ll get a chance to meet Miley Cirrus. If the children try to tell Snoop about the cult of Yig or any other strange happenings, he tells them that is very creative and encourages them to write a song about it.

Chapter Three: "I’ve Made a Terrible Missstake"
At eight o’clock that night, Snoop Dogg begins his concert at the Tomorrowland Terrace, and just below the cult of Yig begins their ritual. The PCs might be there already, but if not, they should arrive just as the cultists are about to complete the ritual.

If any children (including Bianca) have been separated from the rest of the party, they return with the cultists. They are alive, but somehow changed. The light has gone out of their eyes. Their voices are muted, as they ask the PCs to “join usssss.”

The cult leader asks, “Did you think I would let anything bad happen to my favorite children?” He lowers his cowl and reveals himself to be Uncle Matt. He explains that they are just trying to help find a new “friend.”

The PCs can try to disrupt the summoning ritual, but doing so is difficult, as a few burly cultists can probably subdue them. More likely the cultists succeed in summoning a servant of Yig. This creature appears to be a massive snake that flies on bat-like wings. Naturally the first thing it does is consume Uncle Matt. Then it flies up through a trap door and emerges onto the stage where Snoop Dogg is performing.

The children have two main options at this point. They may attempt the ritual of unsummoning that they found in the library of Yig (though doing so will probably drive them insane.) Alternatively they might lure the spawn of Yig over to some of Snoop Dogg’s pyrotechnics, and then explode them all at once. The explosion will be enough to slay the monster, but also runs the risk of catching the PCs in the blast.

Should these options fail, the servant of Yig devours Snoop Dogg and dozens of concert goers before flying away into the night.

Conclusion
However the night ends, the next morning the remaining children (if any) awaken in a plush Disney Hotel, and their parents soon arrive. The Disney Corporation is reticent to acknowledge that the cult of an Elder God was active in one of its parks. Instead it blames any death on malfunction equipment that was part of Snoop Dogg’s stage show. The public at large is quick to believe these stories, and then quick to forget them.

Only the heroes know the truth.

Ingredients
A girl with pigtails: Bianca, the spoiled daughter of Uncle Matt. She keeps her hair in pigtails to look cute and childlike for her father.

The happiest place on earth: Disneyland, whose motto is “The Happiest Place on Earth.”

Half-eaten lunch: Uncle Matt’s vegetarian chili-dog. He is so upset by what he learns on the phone that he leaves in the middle of lunch, and never comes back for it.

Snoop: Mr. Dogg. His name is so similar to the popular Peanuts character that he gets invited to perform at Disneyland. His concert is the site of a dark ritual and mass sacrifice. (Also the children snoop around Disneyland).

A snake, a snake!: There are many snakes in the adventure, but I think the first snake on the Jungle Cruise is the one that fits this best. Initially, people think it is a harmless piece of animatronics (“a snake”), but then they realize it is a live and hungry python (“a snake!”).

Matt the Insstigater: Uncle Matt. Not only does he lead the cult of Yig, and instigates the ritual, he also brought the children to park instigating their involvement. The extra “s” is accounted for because Matt’s lisp makes him elongate all of his “s” sounds, (which of course, makes him sound more snake-like).

 

[Sanzuo]

The Final Hunt​

(Exalted Adventure for Dragon-Blooded Wyld Hunters who think they've seen it all.)​

Lexicon - For those unfamiliar with the terminology of the Age of Sorrows.

• Exalted - A human who has been granted god-like power for reasons far too convoluted to be explained in a single sentence.
• Lunar Exalted - Exalted who serve Luna (the moon)
• Dragon-Blooded - Technically, the weakest type of Exalted but also the most numerous. They serve and protect the Scarlet Empire.
• Anathema - Non-humans and any Exalted who aren't Dragon-Blooded.
• Scarlet Empire - Typical overbearing evil-empire type scenario.
• Creation - The world
• Wyld - Outside of Creation. Icky-bad.
• Wyld Hunt - Kind of like the Gestapo for Anathema.
• Immaculate Order - “Kung-Fu Nazi-Church”
• Behemoth - A really big ancient monster. Like, really, really, retardedly huge.
• Google - use it for the rest

Premise
A group is ordered to locate and destroy an Anathema hiding within the Wyld outside of Creation. This is an epic adventure for a group of Dragon-Blooded player characters of the Wyld Hunt that will take the Circle across the vast reaches of Creation and beyond.


Introduction
At this point the player characters are a proven group of mighty hunters and killers of foul Anathema to the Scarlet Empire. They have sought and slain some of the worst enemies to the Empire including members of the mighty Solar Exalted. Their accomplishments have garnered the attention of Creation's most influential individual, Chejop Kejak. At long last, Kejak has found a dependable group of soldiers to carry on his will in the form of action. He arranges a top-secret meeting with the player characters within the Immaculate Order's main temple on the Blessed Isle and explains their mission to them.


When the Circle enters the chamber, read or paraphrase the following:

Before you in this austere audience chamber located beneath the Immaculate Order's most holy temple is a simply-dressed elderly man. Though the creases in his skin and the silvery, balding hair of his skull betray his age; his physical presence and fierce, piercing gaze of his speckled emerald-colored eyes fill your unconsciousness with awe. In all of your considerable experience this is possibly the most powerful being you have ever met in person.
​

Once the Circle settles themselves, Chejop Kejak will explain their mission:

“You have proven yourselves to likely be the most capable members of the Wyld Hunt I've seen in my life.”

(The Circle truly has no idea how much of a compliment this is.)
“For you I have a task of which only you seem to be capable. There is a foul Anathema of Luna that goes by the name of Matthias who must die. I know you have faced Luna's offspring before, but believe me when I say that Matthias is among the most ancient and cunning of his kind. He has evaded the Wyld Hunt since its foundation and caused no end of torment to the innocent citizens of the Empire and the rest of Creation.
Unfortunately, this monster counts the dreaded creatures of the Wyld as his allies and lives amongst them, far outside the reach of most of the Immaculate Order's agents. Most. That's where you come in. Now I must caution you that this creature that I am asking you to hunt is a master of deception and evasion. He can assume nearly any form and has many agents working for him. So before you go barreling off into the Wyld with your jade artifacts flashing in the light, allow me to offer some wisdom: I advise you to use cunning and guile when seeking this mark. For if you advertise yourselves too readily he will surely see you coming and be gone before you can even face him. I have faith that you can accomplish this task, for only you have both the wisdom to find this Anathema, and the strength to slay it.”
​

He gives the player characters a mission to hunt down and slay an ancient Lunar Exalted who has been a thorn in Kejak's side since the Usurpation. The Lunar goes by the name of Matthias and has been responsible for the destruction of some of Kejak's best laid plans and is an enemy of all civilization. Matthias is a master shape-shifter, assassin and saboteur. He is also ancient and powerful enough to be considered a saint among his own kind. He knows that Kejak is after him and so has gone into hiding within the Wyld itself outside of creation, beyond the gaze of Kejak, his Bronze Faction and the Loom of Fate itself.

Before the Circle departs on their mission, Kejak has one last helpful piece of information:

“We know that this particular Anathema spawned an entire clan of bestial Wyld barbarians deep in the forests beyond the Hundred Kingdoms in the east. I recommend you start your search there.”
​

Part One: The Hunt Begins
At this point in the player character's careers they are influential enough and powerful enough that all of Creation is within their reach. They are able to commandeer and utilize any resource the Scarlet Empire has to offer to reach their goal. They are chasing a master of espionage, however, and their success relies a great deal on their ability to not attract a great deal of attention to themselves, particularly once they leave the borders of the Empire itself.


The only clue they have been given is that sometime in Mattias' ancient past he fathered a litter of offspring who eventually grew into an entire clan of badger-men who live somewhere in the Wyld-tainted forests of the east. This first part of the adventure is relatively open-ended as the players must formulate a way for their characters to make their way east and seek the beastmen of the badger-clan. This is a good opportunity for a number of mini-adventures that stand in the way of the player characters and their goal. Following enough rumors, leads and exploring the wilds will eventually lead them to the badger-clan living beneath the monstrous forests of the east.


When the Circle first encounters members of the badger-clan, read or paraphrase the following:

The Wyld barbarians before you are a hideous amalgamation of human and badger, further warped and twisted by the energies of the Wyld. Some have far too many limbs, vestigial body parts, multiple eyes crammed into single sockets, and other stomach-churning features.
​

Chejop Kejak advised the player characters to use discretion and guile at least up to the point until they have Matthias cornered. Ultimately, how they deal with the badger-clan when they meet them is up to the player characters. They could simply slaughter the beastmen when they meet them, but they are unlikely to gain very much information with this method. Integrating themselves with the clan and meeting civilly with the clan leader is the safest method to gaining information.


When the Circle is brought (or fights their way) before the clan leader, describe him thusly:

You see the largest of the badger-men standing before you well over your heads. His muscles bulge beneath his fur-matted skin. His proportions seem relatively normal except for a second, tiny head that seems to grow out of the side of his neck and echo's everything he says in a shrill mocking tone.
​

He greets the Circle:

Big Head: “Why have you come before badger-clan? Have you come to steal our mushrooms!?”
Little Head: “mushrooms, mushrooms!”
​

When asked about Matthias, the clan leader will respond:

Big Head: “You speak of the All-Father! The one who gave birth to all of badger-clan!”
Little Head: “badger, badger, badger, badger, badger-clan!”
Big Head: “He is our god, and we worship Him as such. Yet it has been many generations since He left us, we know not where He lives.”
Little Head: “where He lives, where He lives!”
Big Head: “Yet there is one being who may yet know. This being is another god, and also an enemy of all badger-kind! It is a Behemoth! A great snake!”
Little Head: “a snake, a snake!”
​

Optional Objective:
The badger-clan regards the one the player characters know as Matthias as a deity; an all-father who created them. As experienced Wyld Hunters, the player characters should already know or at least learn that the badger-clan's worship of Matthias as a deity would grant him real power. If they wish to give themselves an edge when they eventually meet Matthias then they must stop the worship of Matthias. This can be done by manipulating the badger-clan to no longer worship Matthias (a difficult and time-consuming proposition) or by simply wiping out the entire clan. Whichever method the player characters choose, cutting off his worship by the badger-clan would possibly alert Matthias that the Wyld Hunt is on his trail. Either way, this objective is optional.


Part Two: The Behemoth
When the Circle encounters the Behemoth, describe him as such:

Before you in a shadowy jungle valley lies what at first you thought was a small mountain. Instead, you realize, is the slick coiled figure of a massive serpent. One of you must have somehow given yourselves away, because abruptly a glowing amber eye the size of a house opens up on the peak of the mound like a horrible moon-rise. As if moving in slow motion, yet at the same time moving at unfathomable velocity, the titanic serpent uncoils itself and slithers in your direction like a scaly avalanche.
​

After meeting the badger-clan the Circle must seek a mighty Behemoth who is at least as old as Matthias and is the only one who likely knows where he currently resides. When the Circle meets the creature, who appears in the form of a titanic anaconda, they must first fight off its massive assault as it tries to devour them. Only after they have endured the Behemoth's attack for a time will it withdraw and ask the player characters what they want.


After the Circle has fended off the Behemoth's attack for a time, he will withdraw and surround the circle at a respectable distance and address them in a hissing, godlike tone:

“Why have you dissturbed me, lowly creaturess?”
​

When asked about Matthias, the Behemoth will respond:

“Ah, I know him. He iss called Matt the Insstigater amongsst the Fair Folk. I know not why they call him that. Perhapsse it iss becausse he iss part inssect, part tiger and part alligater? No matter. I hear that they ssay he pitss hiss enemiess againsst one another to further hiss ambitionss. I csertainly fought many battless againsst him and hiss many beasstman clanss. The worsst of which are the deliciouss boar-clan that livess in the rainforesstss to the ssouth of here. How I would love to ssnack on thosse deliciouss morssalss oncsse again. Alass, I am too large thesse dayss and they ssee me coming miless away. Perhapsse if you brought me the boar-king'ss daughter we could reach an agreement?
The boar clan likess to hide, even amongsst one another. All of the boar-children look alike, but I happen to know that the king'ss daughter iss a mutant with two tailss.”
​

In order to get the Behemoth to cooperate, the group must first perform a service for it. Long ago the Behemoth was simply an anaconda whose favorite food were the local boars. The boars are long gone, but there exists another clan of beastmen who have long taken on the aspect of boars through Wyld energies and interspecies breeding. The Behemoth specifically seeks the boar-king's daughter, for when she comes of age she will sow the rest of the royal lineage. If the player characters agree to bring the boar-king's daughter to the Behemoth, then it will tell them all that it knows. Like the badger-clan, the boar-clan are all twisted mutants and vary in appearance. The Behemoth tells the Circle that the one he seeks is the girl/piglet that has two tails.


Upon arriving at the territory of the boar-clan, the Circle should have little problem locating the beastmen, for the boar-clan attack intruders on sight. The player characters will have to fight many skirmishes with the boar-clan whilst seeking the piglet-girl with two tails.


Read or paraphrase the following while the Circle searches for the boar-king's daughter:

While the fearsome boar-clan adults stand twice as tall as the largest amongst you, the piglets are 'merely' the size of an adult man and don't go down without a fight. Eventually you find a particularly homely piglet covered in warty nodules and with a pair of, twitching, curly tails on its rear.
​

When they return to the Behemoth with the boar-king's daughter the Behemoth will eagerly devour her in a single swallow. Keeping in with his part of the agreement. (He will be less agreeable if they bring her back already dead, but still grudgingly share his information.) The Behemoth tells the Circle that, last he knew, Matthias was living in “the happiesst place on earth.”


Part Three: The Riddle
The Behemoth's clue is a bit of a riddle. If pressed, the Behemoth will only answer “find the happiesst place on earth and you will find Matt the Insstigater.” The rest is up to the player characters to figure out. This is a good time for the Circle to return to civilization and take a break from any fighting and roughing they may have done to consider the riddle. They could potentially go on another epic journey, traveling all around Creation searching for this happiest place on earth. Along the way, questioning local mortals, spirits and other creatures will gradually reveal certain hints to the solution of this riddle (see below).


The Solution:
On the elemental pole of earth, back on the very center of the Blessed Isle and yet across the boundaries of Creation, there exists a domain belonging to a powerful Fair Folk Luminary who rules over a large group of the Mountain Folk. Like all fey, this Luminary feeds on the souls and emotions of mortals. Being a member of the Entertainer Caste, the Luminary feeds on joy and happiness. It is therefore in his interest for the Luminary to make his realm a veritable paradise for his subjects, keeping them as happy as possible so that his crop of happiness never runs out. His domain is quite literally the happiest place on earth.


If the player characters spend too much time with distractions or otherwise make no progress to the solution for many months then Chejop Kejak will meet with them in secret (and in disguise, of course) and ask why they have been making no progress. He will listen to what they've learned so far and offer his insights to the solution. Kejak knows of the Fair Folk Luminary and his domain on the elemental pole of earth. He will list this as a possible lead among others (which are simply red herrings).


Chejop Kejak will seek the Circle and try to guide them on the right path:

“I've heard rumors of a Fair Folk prince who resides atop the elemental pole of earth. I believe he feeds off of the joy and happiness of his subjects, so you may want to snoop around there.”
​

Part Four: The Luminary's Domain
Hopefully the player characters eventually find their way to the domain of the Luminary. After a brief jaunt across the untamed Wyld (which will doubtless require sorcery and resolve to endure) the player characters will find a subterranean region of semi-stability. As soon as they enter, the Circle is met by the Luminary himself, who appears in all his splendor. It will become quickly apparent that the fey ruler cannot be defeated or even seriously harmed while in his domain with an almost limitless supply of essence to feed him.


When the Luminary appears, he greets the player characters:

“Greetings, children! Ah, you seem to be lost. No matter, you will find yourselves most welcome here... assuming you're willing to pay the price. It is almost my lunchtime you see, and it has been ages since I've sampled the delectable joy of a Dragon-Blooded.”
​

When asked about Matthias:

“Ah, Matt the Instigater! I know him, of course, and despise him. He did come this way, but I soon lost track of him. You are most welcome to seek him and slay him if you wish, assuming you are still willing to enter...”​

The Luminary might be willing to allow the player characters into his domain, but first they must be willing to pay a price. The Luminary asks for half of their souls as the toll for entering his domain, no other bargain will do. The fey lord assures the Circle that half their souls “will not be missed.” If they agree, the player characters will see and feel the Luminary draw a bit of their happiness out of them and into his mouth. They will find themselves feeling very melancholy (well, more melancholy than usual). The Luminary will seem unsatisfied at the unexpectedly meager meal, desiring the other half of his lunch, but will allow the Circle to pass into his domain for the time being.


When the player characters pass into the Luminary's domain, read or paraphrase the following:

The vast, subterranean kingdom you now explore is a constantly changing prism of environments - all beautiful and breathtaking. One chamber might be a flashing array of crystals and another might be a great, three-dimensional garden of delights. When you are about to grow bored of one chamber, a portal or tunnel will open revealing another more wondrous than the last. Various small fey creatures fly about at your beck and call, bringing you whatever you desire.

​

The Circle will find the Luminary's domain to be a baffling labyrinth of temptation and pleasure, every possible want or desire of the player characters are offered and available to them. The stocky mountain folk who reside in the cavern network's mutable areas seem to flitter about in a dreamy state of euphoria. Yet, their bodies seem gaunt and malnourished, for to the Luminary, his subjects are literally cattle. While in this place, the Circle will have to fight against their desires, for if they give into happiness along with the rest of the inhabitants the rest of their souls will become food for the cruel fey ruler.


Part Five and Conclusion: Matthias
If the Circle has been diligent and careful in their search for Matthias, they have a good chance of locating the shape-shifting snoop behind the Luminary's subjects and illusions. When he is surprised to find the Wyld Hunt before him, Matthias will change into his fearsome beast-forms, thinking them to be easy prey like so many others. Matthias will likely be the strongest opponent the player characters have ever faced and some of the Circle members may even die. Chejop Kejak did, however, pick this group for a reason, knowing that they had a chance against the legendary Lunar. If the Circle perseveres and uses all their resources and strategies then they may very well defeat him.

If the Circle screwed around most of the time and barely made any effort to be discreet in their search for the Lunar then they may very well find that Matthias has fled the Luminary's domain before their arrival. He probably got wind of the Wyld Hunt's activities and went far deeper into hiding, making any further attempts to find him nigh impossible. Kejak will be very disappointed in them assuming they can escape from the Luminary's domain; but that's a very minor obstacle compared to what they've been through in the past.


Ingredients

• a girl with pigtails - the piglet-girl of the boar-clan, identifiable by her two tails.
• the happiest place on earth - the domain of a powerful Fair Folk Luminary, who grants his subjects every desire in exchange for literally devouring their happiness.
• half-eaten lunch - in order to enter the Luminary's domain, the Circle must offer half their souls to him. This barely sates the fey.
• snoop - the Circle themselves can be considered snoops for the investigative style this adventure takes. Also, Matthias is a snoop for his modus operandi of meddling in the affairs of others.
• a snake, a snake! - how the Behemoth is referred to by the badger-clan leader's smaller head.
• Matt the Insstigater - Matthias, a Lunar Exalted referred to by this title by the Behemoth and the Fair Folk for his tendency to incite conflict amongst his enemies and turn attention away from himself.

 

[Pbartender]

THE HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH

Bianca is the girl with pigtails. She’s a stereotypical spoiled little brat. Reading through the adventure, I kept envisioning her as an older version of "Darla" from the movie Finding Nemo. She doesn’t seem to serve a great deal of purpose in the adventure, other than as a terribly annoying foil.

Disneyland, of course, is the “happiest place on earth”… All of its advertising has said so for decades. With all the secret behind-the-scenes stuff that goes on at the real Disneyland and Disney World to keep the places running, this has a surprising amount of potential as a setting for an adventure.

Uncle Matt’s departure from the food court serves as the half eaten lunch. It marks the transition out of the introductory chapter of the adventure, but has little other meaning.

”Snoop” is first Snoopy, then Snoop Dogg, the infamous rapper. As is, Snoop Dogg acts as a quick set piece encounter, and later as a possible high profile target for the evil Yiggish bat-snake. On one hand, I hadn’t even considered using him for this ingredient… Very clever, that. On the other hand, I see this as a big missed opportunity. Imagine if instead Snoop Dogg was secretly an old hand when it came to encounters with unspeakable horrors from beyond the realms of reality? There’s potential there for an unusual and long-term patron for the heroes.

”A snake, a snake!” mainly refers to the snake attack during the Jungle Cruise ride. The realization that it’s not an animatronic robot, but an actual snake is a great interpretation of the ingredient’s phraseology. Also, the Yig ties into this ingredient as the Big Bad Evil Snakey Guy, and the as the whole purpose for Uncle Matt’s ritual of nastiness.

Matt the Insstigater is the lisping Uncle Matt, leader of the Cult of Yig, and head ritualist. He bring everyone to the park, and then more or less vanishes from the adventure until the PCs stumble back upon him at the end.

The playability of this adventure is a concern of mine. For much of it, the PCs don’t have anything to do, except sit and watch things happen. In the few spots where they get to do something, it seems to make little difference to the outcome of the adventure one way or another. Consider the first Chapter of the adventure: The PCs are introduced to Matt and Bianca, they get to watch Bianca be a twit, they get to watch Uncle Matt let her get away with it, and they get to watch Uncle Matt subdue a giant snake.

The style of the adventure has a good head start, beginning with it’s location (Disneyland), a major NPC (Snoop Dogg), and the chosen game system and genre (Call of Cthulhu). Although it suffers, in my opinion, from an odd mixture of goofy humor and macabre horror. Choosing one or the other – Scooby Doo or Lovecraft – and sticking to it might have made this a much stronger entry.


THE FINAL HUNT

Matt the Insstigater is the Lunar exalted that the PCs are sent to hunt down and kill. While his real name is “Matthias”, his rivals call him “Matt the Insstigater” for his propensity to start trouble. He’s the entire purpose for the adventure. The explanation for the misspelling is amusing, but a little thin.

“A snake, a snake!” is how the badger-mutant refers to the behemoth to whom the PCs are directed for information. While I know the temptation is difficult to resist with such an ingredient, the reference to the internet meme comes awfully close to crossing the line into silliness. It’s take a thoroughly skillful DM, or thoroughly oblivious players to not have the game take a lengthy turn into digression at that point.

The girl with pigtails is literally has pig tails. She’s a boar-mutant, daughter of the beastman chief, and bringing her to the behemoth to be eaten is the “rats in the basement” that net the PCs a riddle that should lead them to the next step toward Matthias.

The happiest place on earth is part of the riddle that leads the PCs to the Luminary. It refers to the realm in which the luminary lives… A veritable Utopia, such that he can feed off the sublime emotions of it inhabitants. A very tasty usage of the ingredient.

The half-eaten lunch is the Luminary’s price for divulging the whereabouts of Matthias. Specifically, one half of each PC’s soul.

The implementation of snoop in this adventure is the least satisfying of the ingredients, I think. Either explanation is tenuous, and both feel like post script justifications of something that didn’t quite actually make it into the adventure.

The adventure, at its heart, is a standard “hunt the bad guy” sort of plot. There’s nothing wrong with that at all. Everybody likes that sort of adventure now and again. Just be careful for a few possible problems… First, the adventure uses a fairly standard video game device to advance the plot. One NPC directs the PCs to a person who might know the location of the Dingus, but first before he tells you, you must perform this task for him. The next NPC doesn’t know where the Dingus is, but he can tell you if only you pretty please complete this little side quest. And so on and so on through a string of NPCs and side quests until you finally get to the Dingus. In this shorter adventure, it really only happens two or three times, but it can make for a terribly linear plot line, if dragged out for too long.

Also, there two spots where there are possible choke points, depending on what the players decide to do... The first is the riddle. It's a rather obscure riddle, and the answer refers to an in-game location that players may or may not now about. Unless they have intimate meta-knowledge of that specific part of the setting, the only way to get the answer is for the DM to hand it to them. That's a very frustrating and unsatisfying sort of riddle. The second is the Luminary's price for traveling through his realm. What happens if one or more of the PCs refuses to let him nibble on their souls? It's never considered in the adventure write up, there are no other options suggested, and it could stop the adventure cold, depending on how stubborn the DM and PCs decided to be.

The style of the adventure is nice, and has some good imagery: the two tribes of mutant monsters, the enormous snake behemoth, the Luminary's dangerously perfect domain, etc... Watch the silliness with the boar chieftain, though, it would be easy to break the otherwise slightly more serious mood of an anathema hunt. There's a lot of ways this base could be built and expanded upon, if you had more time.

This is a close decision for me...

The use of ingredients are fairly even between the two. I think THE FINAL HUNT has an advantage over the THE HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH for playability. Even though the plot line is a bit linear and there's a couple of potential choke points, THE FINAL HUNT has the PCs driving most of the action, whereas for much of THE HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH it feels like the PCS are just along for the ride. THE FINAL HUNT also gets a slight edge on style. The NPCs and scenery are descriptively interesting, and have a lot of possibilities for interesting interactions. THE HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH has a lot of potential here for surprising revelations about popular theme parks and rap stars, but seems to fall flat by giving us all the usual things we expect to not expect. Furthermore, the adventure is confused about whether it should be goofy-horror or gruesome-horror, and the two don't mix well here.

Sansuo with THE FINAL HUNT wins by a nose.

 

[Radiating Gnome]

Round 2 Match 3
Green Dice vs. Pro Paladin
Judge: Radiating Gnome


Ingredients:
Gelatinous Cube
Topiary Maze
Selfless Pretender
Entitlement
Ring of the Ram
Rope Ladder

 

[Pro-Paladin]

Winter's Grasp

A fantasy adventure for 3-5 players.


When I look at a solitary oak
I think: the patriarch of the woods.
It will outlive my forgotten age
As it outlived that of my grandfathers'.

-Pushkin


Summary

A Druid serving the Old Gods is determined to protect nature by stopping humanity's progress toward civilization. The PCs are sent to stop him, but to do so they must face the full wrath of both nature and fallen mankind.


Background

This adventure is intended for a party of low level characters (level 3-5) who have few if any magical items. Having at least one character with wilderness survival skills will be helpful, but is not necessary.


Setting

This adventure takes place in a land called Vanag. This area is noted for its bitterly cold winters, muddy spring and fall and mild summers. Massive forests, mighty rivers and towering mountain ranges isolate it from the rest of the world. Hundreds of years ago the land was united under a single powerful ruler. Civilization thrived and great cities sprung up along the many rivers. The old superstitions of worshiping the many Gods of nature were abandoned in favor of the Monotheistic and highly organized worship of Perkans, the Sun God.

The golden age proved short-lived, however. In time the ruling bloodline grew complacent and greedy. Finally, the Kingdom fragmented into many tiny slivers, fighting for control...or survival.

Today in Vanag tyranny, starvation, enslavement, roaming monsters and senseless wars are common. Life is short and miserable and people are seen as little more than expendable resources by the warlords that rise to power. Ignorance and superstition are rife. Magic has all but disappeared and is only kept alive by the extreme, some would say mad, devotion of a few toward the Gods.

In one small community, however, there is a ray of hope.


Obren

The city of Obren was little different from any of the other small settlements that dot the land, until recently. The current Prince (all rulers in Vanag claim to be descendants of the Old Kingdom), Boris IX, showed very little promise in the first days of his rule and it seemed likely he would fall to the usurpers seeking control of his very modest principality.

Then, he suddenly became the most capable ruler that Vanag has seen in literally centuries. The usurpers were defeated, outside enemies and monsters were driven back and Obren began to rapidly expand, taking larges bites out of the surrounding forests in the process as the lumber fueled the growth of the city's structures and the newly cleared areas were converted to farmland.

One key to the expansion was granting the right of property to the serfs, who are treated as little more than property themselves elsewhere. This encouraged the development of the settlement and has also attracted refugees who had been enslaved elsewhere. There has even been talk of eventually allowing the common person to elect representatives to act as advisers to the Prince.

As the city grows to truly earn the name "city" nature has been beaten back and tamed to suit the needs of this new awakening. This has not gone unnoticed.

Obren is currently in the grip of several weeks of extreme cold, despite it being late spring. When the city was hit with a blizzard on the day of the Summer Festival many began to suspect this strange weather pattern might not be completely natural. People are starting to worry.


The Party

Ideally the PCs should have been using Obren as a base of operations for at least a little while, allowing them to witness the changes in the community and build their own reputation here. Otherwise, "just passing through" will work, the PCs will need to seek shelter from the latest blizzard. The Party should be Good aligned. Their reputation as great heroes of amazing power (4th Level!) and goodness will lead to an invitation to meet with the Prince and discuss the current crisis.

If desired, the Party has a little time to check out the rumors around town before the meeting. The following bits of information are available. If the party has been based in Obren this information should already be known to them, otherwise a few rolls and more role-playing is in order.

- The winter weather at this time of year is extremely unusual.
- Obren has many enemies among the other settlements of Vanag.
- The forest is a dangerous place.
- The peasants are happy with the freedoms they have been granted.
- Most people approve of Prince Boris.
- The people here mostly serve Perkans, but some still worship the Old Gods.
- Followers of the Old Gods blame the "falling away" from their worship for the problems in Vanag.

When the party meets the Prince in the city's small and very modestly furnished castle they will be escorted into a back room. Here they will be told the secret of the community.


Gleaning from the Cube

Alone with just the Prince and his personal servant, it will be the servant that steps forward to address the heroes. "If I am to bargain with you in good faith, you must see me as I truly am." With that, the servant removes the illusion. The Party is standing in front of a Gelatinous Cube.

This Cube is the result of an appeal performed by a half-mad hermit. This hermit was deeply devoted to Perkans and hoped to awaken "the innate goodness" in all things. The Cube living in the cave where he performed his meditations proved to be the first test subject. The Sun God allowed this miracle to occur for his devoted servant and the monster became self-aware and Lawful Good. It was educated by its creator, but when the hermit was slain in a surprise attack by bandits the bizarre creature was forced to venture into the world.

The monster possesses psionic abilities and used them to disguise its appearance and gain influence within the court of Obren. When the usurpers threatened, it was the guidance and psychic abilities of the creature that prevented disaster. Since then it has encouraged the reform of Obren and the new rights of the peasantry. In some ways this monster has become an Avatar of the Sun God, although not nearly as powerful.

The Cube will speak telepathically to the PCs. It will introduce itself as "Zhela" and will explain its background if asked. If the characters attempt to become aggressive the Cube can use a calming aura to stop any violence. This ability only functions on characters who are Good-aligned and/or worshipers of Perkans.

Zhela will then inform the characters about the current crisis. Word has reached the true ruler of Obren that a murderous Druid named Makar is behind the lingering winter weather. The Druid is determined to destroy Obren before it can threaten the natural balance and has been in contact with local warlords and bandit leaders.

Zhela will explain that the PCs cannot hope to defeat the Druid with their present resources. "His skin is like the bark of an oak!" Instead they will need to use "the magic of the Old Ones against them!" He has received word that an evil Fighter and warlord named Vasily has such a magic item, a ring that packs the fury of charging mountain ram!

Ideally the meeting should end with the PCs agreeing to battle the Druid and being directed to the small settlement ruled by Vasily to gain the power needed for that battle.

If the party decides to go after the Druid directly, let them try and fail (or succeed, with a lot of skill and luck!). The survivors should want to regroup and go after Vasily's magic item. If they earn a victory against the odds allow the adventure to continue, but the final battle to save Obren might prove very hard to win.

If the PCs decline the mission the final attack on Obren mentioned later occurs, only this time it is led by the Druid Makar and further reinforced by summoned animals. "Don't get killed" would count as a victory in this case.


The Cold

Throughout the rest of the adventure the winter weather should serve as an additional adversary to the PCs, one they can endure but not defeat. Snow will fall and obscure vision, thick snow on the ground slows travel, patches of ice could lead to falls and exposed flesh will quickly suffer from exposure. Careful preparation and magic will certainly help but the bitter winter is relentless.

In a few cases the cold should become a more serious problem. The characters might need to cross a frozen river, find shelter from an especially violent blizzard or help an ally whose warm coat was damaged in combat. Hope someone took "sewing" as a skill! Don't overuse these situations, but save them for when the party starts taking the setting for granted.


Makar

The Druid has faithfully served the Old Gods for most of his nearly seventy winters and has been granted powers to strangle civilization's revival while it's still in the crib. These largely forgotten Gods see mankind's current misery as an opportunity to reassert their authority and restore their rightful place in the Universe. If it leads to more human misery, so be it, as long as they are honored once again.

Makar lives in a magical hut four miles north of Obren. From here he plans to use his magic to destroy the community: casting "Control Weather" to prolong the winter, "Plant Growth" to rebuild the damage to the forest, "Animal Summoning" and "Call Lightning" to kill the peasants, etc. He also plans to use the local warlords for his purposes and has already brought Vasily to his side by offering magical aid to the villain.

Makar is True Neutral. To achieve his ends of protecting the natural world he will engage in activities many would say are evil, but to his beliefs this is merely the necessary equalizing of the world's extremes and the preservation of the natural order. When he kills it is with the dispassion of a predator taking the prey.

The Old Gods have given Makar a great deal of power to achieve their goals. In addition to the usual Druid abilities he is protected by a powerful divinely-bestowed Barkskin that makes him immune to all non-magical weapons (he is old and somewhat frail and has few hit points otherwise). Reflecting his role as a servant of the Winter Spirits he is immune to cold and takes minimum possible damage from fire. Summoned animals and animals befriended with "Animal Friendship" will always accompany him.


The Evil Fighter

Vasily rules a small community about ten miles east of Obren. Of course the trip is half the fun and the danger of the bitter cold should be played up as much as possible. If the DM wishes to run a short encounter, an ambush or straight-up fight against some of Vasily's raiders would be ideal. It's still early in the adventure, though, so the fight should go the PCs' way after some initial difficulty (The brigands assumed the PCs were ordinary travelers and will retreat once the tide turns. No profit in dying!).

Vasily has enslaved a small community. The peasants are forced to grow Sornak, a tough leafy plant that can survive the bitter winters of Vanag. It is then used to make rope, the main commodity the slave city produces. It is traded for weapons to arm the bandit-soldiers of the evil Fighter. The peasants are poorly fed and clothed and many are diseased. Death is common, but more slaves can always be acquired by force.

The best course of action is to infiltrate, use social skills to win over the suffering peasants and use the information gained (Vasily keeps the ring in a chest near his bed when he sleeps) to steal the ring. A direct attack on Vasily, hopefully when he's alone (maybe have the peasants create a diversion?), could also work. Perhaps the clothes of the bandits killed earlier could be used as a disguise? Careful players should be successful, reckless players are going to struggle here.


The Druid's Maze

Armed with a weapon capable of dealing with the Druid (hopefully!) the party must now journey into the heart of the forest where Makar rules his savage subjects. The attacks will begin soon after the party leaves Obren and will become more deadly as they get closer. The first encounter might be with a murder of ravens trying to peck the characters, then a lone wolf, then a wolf pack, then a bear, etc.

Each of these encounters should reward tactical play. For example, the wolf pack is best dealt with by going "back to the wall" with some natural barrier so that the wolves can not encircle, flank and attack from behind.

Exposed flame will also be the party's friend, both for keeping aggressive animals at bay and for warmth against the bone-chilling cold that becomes more severe as the party gets closer to the Druid. From an overlooking hill the Characters can see the snow-covered hut of the Druid, but also a massive natural obstacle of bushes, evergreens, leaf-less oaks and many other plants held in the half-alive stasis of the unnatural winter.

The heroes eventually will reach a point where the forest is so overgrown that further advancement seems impossible. Careful investigation will reveal small passages that allow progress. The Characters must now navigate a confusing maze of frost-covered plant-life whose branches often blot out the weak sun in the overcast sky above. Treat this section as a dungeon, except in some cases the PCs can cut through the "walls" (hope someone brought an axe!).

Several keyed encounters can be placed with killer wildlife, but more effort should be made to play up the claustrophobia of the maze. Animals will be heard moving about, rustling frozen limbs, but nothing can be seen. A mournful wolf howling breaks the tension of silence, while adding new tension on top of it.

A few of the plants have been animated to attack and this should be a nasty and unexpected surprise when it happens. Characters will suddenly be enveloped by a cloud of snow spraying from the moving limbs that tear and crush!


A Hut with Eagle Feet

If the party survives the attacks in the maze they will reach the center grove where the home of the Druid shifts about on four giant, taloned legs. This bizarre structure will attempt to kill the PCs, by attacking with a single huge talon while the other legs balance. Within the doorless square hut on top of the giant avian legs Makar will bide his time, revealing himself only if necessary.

The Ring of the Ram will help immensely. Attacking the hut itself (a little knock on the "door") will quickly smash it to splinters, revealing Makar. PCs might also try to trip the hut by using the ring against the eagle legs. More conventional tripping attacks with rope or perhaps rolling logs (takes some time to set up that one!) might also be attempted. It's possible to hurt the legs by attacking them with weapons of spells, but they are resistant to damage.

When forced from his hut Makar will begin summoning animals to slay the characters. While he chants prayers to the Old Gods the frozen limbs surrounding the characters will begin to shake violently as the summoned creatures rush through the maze to answer the call. Quick action will stop the Druid, but it will be tougher the longer the fight goes. Again, the best bet is to use the Ring of the Ram on the old man, as it bypasses all his defenses. Two or three full strength hits should finish him, maybe less if he can be knocked off the hut (a twenty foot fall). When Makar dies the legs of the hut will dissolve and the summoned animals will leave, so targeting the Druid while the other characters hold off his summoned reinforcements is the best course of action.

The Druid is fanatically sure of his eventual victory and will fight to the death. As he dies the snowfall ceases and the sun peaks from behind a cloud.


The Walls of Obren

The PCs return home victorious and should have some time to recover from their harrowing experiences in Makar's forest. However, the danger has not passed. On the morning of the third or forth day, just as the snow is melting away to expose patches of grass beneath, the Evil Warlord Vasily sends his armies against the city.

Vasily, or his equally ambitious successor if he was killed by the characters earlier, is here for revenge. Having his ring stolen has greatly weakened his authority over semi-loyal fellow bandits. To get that loyalty back he plans to lead them to victory against the city that has been hurting his efforts to enslave and dominate. In the case of the successor, he is chasing glory and power while ostensibly revenging his slain predecessor.

Behind the wooden walls of Obren morale is high ("come and do your worst!"), until the secret weapon of the raiders is revealed. Slowly advancing from the shadows of the forest is what appears to be a twenty foot tall man. As it comes closer, it's clear that this is no human.

Constructed of tightly pulled rope from the slave-grown Sornak plant this giant Golem resembles a man who has been flayed of his skin, revealing taught tendons. Huge hands open and close, as if anticipating the violence they will deal. As if that wasn't bad enough, the monster is covered with a layer of ice!

This Rope Golem, constructed of the only suitable raw material readily available in the slave encampment, was a final gift to Vasily from Makar and has enough intelligence to follow rather detailed instructions. This time, it's been ordered to lead the attack on Obren and act as a ladder.


Frozen Rope

The golem will approach the walls with a slow, almost casual gait while javelins, arrows and even flaming arrows bounce harmlessly off its icy armor. When it reaches the wall the Golem drops to one knee as if praying, forming stairs with its hand, knee and bowed head. While special assault troops climb its body by sinking metal mountaineering hooks into its icy skin for balance it swats at defenders on the wall with its free hand. A hail of arrows supports this attack on the wall. As groans of despair rise from the city's defenders, the PCs are taken away from the walls by a royal guard who has urgent orders for them.

The time has come for Zhela, the Gelatinous Cube, to appear in his true form for one last stand against the forces of evil and chaos. Zhela quickly communicates the plan telepathically as it is guided toward the gate of the city by soldiers (they have been told Zhela is a trained monster). The cube will create as much havoc as possible by attacking Vasily's raiders, while the PCs will take out the Golem.

Zhela will create at least a temporary panic in the attackers with his appearance, before being hacked apart. This is the PCs chance to hit the Rope Golem. While covered in frost the Golem can only be hurt by bludgeoning weapons (use that ring, again!) and it takes half damage from fire. After losing a third of its hit points to such damage the frost layer has been smashed or melted off and the Golem can now be damaged by slashing weapons (bludgeoning it does no further damage) and it takes double damage from fire. When the Golem is defeated the attackers panic and flee.

As the battle turns in the defenders favor (hopefully!) allow the characters to order the defending army: "Shoot flaming arrows at it! Now!" or "Out the gates, smash them!" The defenders might still do these actions, but it's far more fulfilling if they do so under orders from the characters.

As the brigands flee, the scattered remains of the cube slowly melt into the earth, joining the snow and shed blood.


Aftermath

Assuming the battle is won, the characters become the heroes of Obren and will be taken into the full confidence of Prince Boris and can become the power behind his rule if they wish to do so. The Prince is not a strong ruler and it might be best if one of the characters eventually replaces him, perhaps when the party's Fighter or Paladin reaches "name level."

Alternately, the PCs can choose to simply leave, having "put things right." Obren's future is uncertain, but a major blow has been dealt to her enemies and for the time being there is reason for optimism.

Besides, another adventure awaits, perhaps on the other side of that mountain range...


Other Options

It is possible that the Druid appeals to the PCs for their aid rather than immediately attacking. For now the threat to the natural world is minimal, but who knows what the future holds if the human settlements continue to grow? If the characters are won over they may find themselves leading the attack on Obren rather than defending it.

If the characters fail to defend Obren, but survive its fall the campaign should continue. Now the PCs will have to work from the shadows, freeing slaves, defeating bandits and trying to restore what was lost. It's likely that Vasily or his successor will not remain permanently loyal to the Druid, in which case this chaos might be used to defeat them both.



Ingredient Review

Gelatinous Cube: The Cube in this adventure has gained self-awareness and serves as a bizarre servant of the Sun God and true ruler of Obren. Like Obren itself, it is a symbol of Good showing up in an unlikely place, against all odds. At the same time, its abilities as a Ooze are fully deployed in the final battle.

Topiary Maze: The PCs must make their way through the maze of the Druid before confronting him. In this case the maze is trimmed and formed through magic and is designed to keep intruders from reaching the Druid's Grove.

Selfless Pretender: Zhela, the Gelatinous Cube, pretends to be an ordinary monster so he can sacrifice himself in the final battle. He also masquerades as a servant to the Prince. The Prince himself also fills this rule, pretending to rule while he selflessly allows Zhela, who is far more capable, to rule in his place.

Entitlement: On one hand the granting of entitlements in the form of rights for the serfs has led to the growth and strength of Obren, which will fuel the conflict. On the other, the Old Gods feel entitled to humanity's worship and will win it back by force if necessary.

Ring of the Ram: This magic ring is the weapon the PCs need to defeat the Druid and later the Rope Golem. The power of the ring can "knock on the door" of the doorless hut of Makar and then it can bypass his numerous resistances. It is also ideal for turning the Frozen Rope Golem into an ordinary, easily set alight Rope monster. Finally, the theft/acquisition by violence of this item sets up the final conflict.

Rope Ladder: The Rope Golem itself fills this roll in the final battle. Unlike ordinary ladders or siege engines its special magical construction makes it very hard to destroy...except for the resourceful PCs, of course.

 

[Green Dice]

Let Sleeping Cubes Lie
A DnD 4e side quest for heroic tier characters

Background:
The grand city of Hollowset was built over a vast canal system of intertwining tunnels and corridors. These passages were thought to be from a long gone civilization. Although little was known about the labyrinth, the engineers building Hallowset felt they’d be useful as a complex sewer system for the city. The citizenry of Hallowset enjoyed the relative cleanliness provided by the sewers beneath the city and, as a result, people flocked to Hallowset. Time passed and the city grew into a metropolis.

Hallowset was ruled by a benevolent magic user named Fribarrin. He surrounded himself with good advisors and councilors including a man by the name of Ragios, the Captain of the Guard and a man of noble blood. Fribarrin wanted to rule justly and fairly for the people of his city. However, the peace was shattered when the city was beset by a grotesque monster from the very sewers themselves – a large six sided, transparent monster! The gelatinous cube dissolved the city, buildings and people alike. Fribarrin ordered Ragios to gather his men to combat the monster while he took his council of mages to come up with an arcane solution to their plight.

Although the Hallowset Guard fought well, many men died. Ragios managed to minimize damage to the city by luring the monster back down into the sewers. Although the immediate danger was gone, there was still the problem of having this creature lurking below the city and it’d only be a matter of time until it emerges again to wreak havoc.

Fribarrin, at work with his mages, found a way to defeat the gelatinous cube. Heading down to the sewers with Ragios and the Hallowset Guard, the combined efforts of the army and the mages managed to push the monster into the deep underground. Many men were lost during this offensive, but it was for the good of the city. Once at the heart of the sewer, Fribarrin unleashed his magic and sealed the monster within the walls of the labyrinth – however, he was trapped as well.

Although it was Fribarrin that defeated the monster, the people saw Ragios emerge from the catacombs victorious. Dubbed the Hero of Hallowset, the people demanded that he be placed in command. Fribarrin’s son, who was being groomed to take over after his father, was too young to assume the position as ruler of Hallowset and Ragios was made ruler. Fribarrin’s family challenged that decision and they were banished for their efforts.

Generations have passed and Ragios' descendants have held power this whole time. The city has become but a mere shadow of its former self. The sewers are as dangerous as ever – they are crawling with small gelatinous cubes. Sometimes, a small group of them make their way to the surface and plague the city.

Placing the Grand City
The DM can place the Grand City of Hallowset anywhere s/he desires. I see it as being in the middle of a wasteland. Not particularly a desert but more in a dust bowl of sorts. An area that was once fertile land but has become a dry and cracked wasteland

Enter the Heroes
After travelling for many days through the wasteland, any sign of civilization should be welcome. They can fill their water skins, grab a few nights rest in a real bed and perhaps get some food... with actual flavor! Of course, the DM can have the heroes going to Hallowset for any number of other reasons involving their campaign. Perhaps they need to seek an alliance with the city or maybe they are tracking down a specific person, a merchant or outlaw, who was last seen in Hallowset.

I. The Grand City of Hallowset
Upon reaching Hallowset, the heroes see it is a great walled city that has seen better days. The crumbing towers and ramparts seem right at home against the background of a devastated landscape. If it wasn’t for the small groupings of houses outside the walls and the plumes of smoke rising up from inside the city, the place would seem deserted from a far.

Making a History Check:
15 - Hallowset is a major stopping point for travelers trekking across the wasteland. The city went through a prosperous time and it was known for having a complex sewer system and was an extremely clean city. But then the city hit hard times when the ruling family changed.

20 - The last ruling family was ousted when the city was attacked by a large Gelatinous Cube and since changed the direction of the city. The Ragios family took power when the last ruler was killed in the attack.

25 -The city has been plagued by a continuous onslaught of small gelatinous cubes coming up from the sewer system. Hallowset was built on top of a complex system of tunnels and channels which make up its sewer system. These corridors were thought to be the remnants of an ancient civilization.

The gate guards are dressed in the tan and white uniforms of the Hallowset Guard. They allow the heroes in after some questioning. Hallowset is a traveler’s haven and the guard wouldn’t think of turning away a source of good coin from the city. Inside the city, it looks as if a thousand different cultures collided. Smells of exotic foods waft through the air and the sounds of a bustling city are commonplace. Many rows of taverns and inns line the streets in an attempt to lure travelers in for a nights rest. A great market place dominates the center of town. This would be a great opportunity for DMs to introduce any sorts of odd equipment or magical device for the heroes to purchase (or steal). It is pretty obvious that this city is on hard times. Many people look poor, filthy and destitute. Children without shoes run around begging for money and food. There is a heavy presence of guardsmen patrolling the city in groups of 2 to 4.

At random intervals, there are giant grates coming up out of the ground. The air around these vents is foul. These are the entrances to the vast sewer system beneath Hallowset. Sometime during the heroes’ initial visit to the city, a group of small gelatinous cubes emerge from one of these grates and attack the citizens. Screams for help can be heard around the city and all the guards in the area run to protect the citizenry. If the heroes help defend the city (and they probably will), the guards and citizens alike are very grateful. Most travelers just don’t care enough to help the way the heroes do. If the heroes offer to descend into the sewers to end this problem for good, the guards and citizens tell them about the complex system of intertwining corridors and tunnels beneath the city. Many bands of adventurers have gone down there and didn’t even make a dent in the number of cubes that attack; if they come back at all. Living under the constant threat of attack by the small cubes has become a way of life in Hallowset.

While exploring Hallowset, the heroes come across an old man screaming and hollering at anyone who will listen to him. This is Zaabarrin, the crazy old man who lives in a tower a few miles from town. He's a self proclaimed historian and will tell anyone who listens about the history of Hallowset, specifically about the city's most prosperous time under the rule of his Grandfather, Fribarrin. He'll tell the heroes about how his grandfather brought the city from a small trading outpost to a grand metropolis. He'll also talk about how he loves this city (mostly because of his familial ties to it) and wishes to be a part of it. If asked why he doesn't just move into Hallowset itself, Zaabarrin goes into the tale of the Gelatinous Cube that attacked the city from the sewers and how his Grandfather died protecting the city. With a sneer, he says his family was repaid for his Grandfather's heroism by removing them from power and installing the Ragios family as the rulers of the city. Calming himself, Zaabarrin says that there is nothing he can do about that now. All he can do is let people know what his family did for the city and try to make Hallowset a place his Grandfather would be proud of. Zaabarrin takes a liking to the heroes and offers them a place to stay for the night. He'd love to tell more tales about Hallowset and, in return, he'd like to hear more about the "outside" world. He doesn't get out of the wasteland much. Considering the exuberant prices of the local inns, this should seem like a great option for the heroes. Zaabarrin says he'll wait for the heroes to be done in the city and he'll escort them to his tower.

If the heroes ask around town about Zaabarrin, they confirm his story. He is a loud old man who is related to the former ruler of the city. The guards don't like him and often give him a difficult time about being in the city. The current ruler does not like him in town and refuses him to live there. The guards have orders to chase him out of town if they see him. Many people are afraid of him.

When the heroes are done with their shopping or any other business they may have in the city, they can find Zaabarrin in the same place they found him the first time. A small group of guards have surrounded the old man and are giving him a hard time. They are trying to get him to leave the city since he is not welcome. Once the heroes arrive and the guards leave, Zaabarrin pulls out a bag of holding from his robes. From the bag, he pulls out a tightly wound rope ladder. While he unravels the ladder, it looks rather ordinary. With a flick of the wrist, Zaabarrin throws the ladder up into the air where it hangs vertically up in the air. The uppermost part of the rope ladder fades away to nothing. He explains that this ladder will take them to his tower. Although he looks like a beggar, he now seems more like a wizard. He starts to climb up the ladder hanging in midair and beckons the heroes to follow him. He then fades to nothing as he reaches the top of the ladder.

II. Zaabarrin's Tower
Climbing the ladder opens a portal into Zaabarrin's Tower, a few miles outside of Hallowset. The portal drops the heroes out in the middle of a ritual circle inscribed with numerous runes and arcane symbols. Looking around the large chamber, there are numerous bubbling bottles and liquids on tables. Dusty books and tomes line tall bookshelves and jars of different substances are strewn about. A particularly large jar holds a small squirming gelatinous cube, the same size as one of the cubes the heroes fought in the city. Next to the jar holding the cube is a large throne-like chair which Zaabarrin is climbing into. He waves his hand and chairs float in through an open door and he begs the heroes to take a seat.

Zaabarrin begs the heroes to tell him about the outside world before allowing them to ask questions of him. Zaabarrin admits he is a bit offended that his family was ousted from power and that it is he that should be ruling Hollowset. But what is done is done and since he, in his advanced age, does not have long to live, all he wishes to accomplish is to make Hallowset a better place. If asked about the small Gelatinous Cube, Zaabarrin smiles and says that this little guy is the key to his grand plan. He feels it fitting that since it was his Grandfather who saved Hallowset from the large Gelatinous Cube back in the day and he wants his mark on the city to be halting the onslaught from the hordes of small cubes.

Zaabarrin then admits that it is because of his grand plan that he invited the heroes back to his tower. He believes that he is able to ward off the little monsters using a ritual his Grandfather was researching. He has all the ingredients he needs but he needs the correct incantations to use. Fortunately, Zaabarrin knows where he can find the incantations he needs. Unfortunately, the information he needs is written in a tome that his Grandfather used to help defeat the original Gelatinous Cube and it is now sealed up within the labyrinth of sewers beneath the city. He asks the heroes to descend into the bowels of the city where the epic final battle with the Gelatinous Cube was fought and retrieve his Grandfathers spellbook. He explains that the fight took place in the center of the sewers and the chamber would be sealed behind walls with his grandfather's seal on it. Zaabarrin hobbles over to a cabinet and removes a jeweled box. From the box, he removes a large iron ring with the head of a ram on top. Zaabarrin explains that this ring has been in his family for generations and was worn by his Grandfather. It is the only way to break the seal protecting the chamber where his Grandfather lies. He emphasizes that the lower levels of the sewer is maze-like and no credible map exists.

If your heroes need some monetary motivation for undertaking this quest, Zaabarrin can offer considerable sums of gold, mostly in the form of ritual components or maybe a magic item or two.

As the heroes depart in the morning, Zaabarrin gives them one more gift: His magic rope ladder. He says that as soon as they find the book, they can use it to open a portal directly back to the tower.

III. Into the Sewer
Back at Hallowset, the heroes have no problem finding a suitable entrance to the sewer system. As luck would have it, the heroes arrive just in time for another hostile wave of small gelatinous cubes.

Once in the sewers, they look like any other sewer system. But once they descend into the lower levels of the sewer, the tunnels, chambers and corridors become more complex. The heroes come across the dead bodies of adventurers who tried to navigate these tunnels before them. Eventually, the sewer becomes a veritable maze. The walls of the tunnels go from being lined with slime and sludge on the upper areas to being covered with moss, lichen and other types of plant life. During their search, the heroes come across swarms of small gelatinous cubes feeding on this plant life. This is how these little monsters survive down here in order to attack the city.

"Into the Sewer" can be run as a skill challenge. Every success brings them closer to their goal and every failure causes them to stumble across a swarm of small gelatinous cubes. Failing the skill challenge still gets the heroes to their destination, but everyone loses a healing surge from being fatigued.

When the heroes find the sealed room in the center of the sewer system, they find a large group of small gelatinous cubes who seem to be guarding the way into the chamber. After fighting off the cubes, they can use the power of the ring to break the seal on the wall and it comes tumbling down. The chamber beyond has not been disturbed since it was sealed and it seems like a tomb. Taking up much of the floor is a thin sticky layer of bluish green slime. Any hero that touches it takes 1 HP of acid damage. It is easily deduced that this is the remains of the old Gelatinous Cube. A skeleton in tattered robes is on the floor clutching a satchel. There are many other remains in the room but this is the only one that looks to be the remains of a magic user. The book inside the satchel seems to pulse with magic and rituals and spells are scribbled on its pages.

After securing the book, the heroes can use the magic rope ladder to create a portal back to Zaabarrin's tower.

IV. Zaabarrin's Tower - revisited
Getting back to the tower, the heroes see Zaabarrin standing at the edge of the ritual circle pouring different chemicals into the jar containing the small gelatinous cube. As the liquids dissolve the small cube, he kicks the jar over and it smashes onto the floor. The glowing blue contents spread over the ritual circle. A stereotypical villainous laugh erupts from Zaabarrin as he thanks them for allowing him to finish his ritual. This may confuse some of the heroes since they haven't given the wizard the book yet. The book was never Zaabarrin's objective, knocking down the seal around the chamber was. With the seal removed, he was able to finish his ritual to reawaken the Gelatinous Cube.

Why? Because Zaabarrin's family should be the ones who are ruling Hallowset. Stripped of authority, his family was cast out and Ragios' heirs drove the city into the ground. As revenge, Zaabarrin is unleashing the terror from Hallowset's past back on the city. After all, it is what the city deserves after they way they ousted his family from power.

Zaabarrin then attacks the heroes. He doesn't expect to win, but he merely wishes to slow them down so that the Gelatinous Cube can wreak havoc on Hallowset. If they stay and fight Zaabarrin, by the time they get back to Hallowset, the Gelatinous Cube will already be in the city destroying buildings and killing citizens. The Hallowset Guard, armed citizens and other adventurers will be attempting to stave off the monster but won't make any progress until the heroes arrive. If they leave immediately (they can even climb back down the rope ladder if they haven't dismissed the portal yet), they can catch the Gelatinous Cube in the sewers below the city. However, they would have made Zaabarrin into a recurring villain who now blames them for ruining his plans for revenge.

After defeating the Gelatinous Cube, the heroes are celebrated and join the ranks of those with the title of "Hero of Hallowset". Whether or not Zaabarrin was killed, his tower is now deserted and the heroes can use this tower as a base of operations for future adventures.

Continuing the Adventure:
Although this was meant to be a side quest, it can spawn new adventures all by itself.

- The heroes may want to complete Zaabarrin's initial plan and rid the sewers of the small cubes and try to find their origin by exploring the complex tunnels under the city.
- Zaabarrin's tower could be filled with wild experiments and artifacts that could lead the heroes onto numerous adventures.
- Zaabarrin's Grandfathers book could be studied by a magic user and become the catalyst for many adventures.
- The current ruler of Hallowset would have definitely heard of the heroes' exploits by now and perhaps he wants to personally thank them for all they've done for the city; and then hire them for a quest of his own.

Ingredients:
Gelatinous Cube: Not only is Hallowset under constant attack from small gelatinous cubes, but it was besieged by a large Gelatinous Cube once in the past and again when it was awakened by Zaabarrin.

Topiary Maze: The lower sewer system becomes a maze of tunnels that are lined with moss, lichen and other foliage that acts as food for the small gelatinous cubes.

Selfless Pretender: Zaabarrin, the main antagonist of the adventurer and the one who sends the heroes on down into the sewers. He pretends that he wants to do something good for the people of Hallowset as one of his last acts before he passes away. Instead he tricks the heroes into giving him the opportunity to unleash the terror of the Gelatinous Cube upon the city.

Entitlement: Zaabarrin, the grandson to the first ruler of Hallowset believes he should be the one to rule over the grand city. Since he cannot, he wishes it to be consumed by the Gelatinous Cube.

Ring of the Ram: A gift from Zaabarrin so that the heroes can open up the sealed chamber where the Gelatinous Cube lies so that his magic can revitalize the monster.

Rope Ladder: The magical rope ladder that opens a portal into the main chamber of Zaabarrin's Tower.

 

[Pbartender]

Round 2, Match 4
ajanders vs. Wik
Judge: Pbartender

Ingredients:
the man in the straw hat
tattooed hand
a fake pirate ship
an alien in a jar
foundations of electromagnetic theory
DANGER: Stand 3 feet distant

Submissions are due June 26th, 11:55 am CST.

 

[ajanders]

Submission for round 2

Ingredients:
the man in the straw hat
tattooed hand
a fake pirate ship
an alien in a jar
foundations of electromagnetic theory
DANGER: Stand 3 feet distant

"In Space, No-one Can Hear You Solve V=IR"

Game Information
This adventure is written for a pulp-science fiction or space opera game. The mechanical conventions referenced here are from D20 Future.

Synopsis
When a pirate haven suddenly sends a distress signal, the PC's investigate. They must pretend to be pirates in order to approach the station safely. Once docked at the station, they meet with the last surviving member of the Yellow Hat pirates, who explains that a lightning monster is loose on the station, killing everyone. A moment later, he is killed by the lightning monster in a swift strike.
Rapid research by the PC's reveals the lightning monster to be a previously unknown energy-based life form: an intelligent electrical field. It's hiding in the power systems of the station and striking out at humans for unknown reasons. The PC's must figure out how to trap the thing. This can only be done by physically isolating it in a section of power conduit (cutting wires), then dropping it in a BIG capacitor. The PC's can use materials aboard the station to construct a Leyden Jar.
The PC's must locate the lightning monster's nucleus: a concentration of electrical energy...tracking the nucleus by deducing what the signs of its presence must be, then tracking them visually,trap the nucleus, then connect the conducter of the Leyden Jar to the nucleus of the lighting monster.
While doing this, the PC's must negotiate with a rival gang (The Bloody Red Hands of Death) for the use of materials and accesses to hunt the monster and dodge the monsters attacks.


Prologue
Backstory
Blackside Station is the proverbial hive of scum and villainy. Far from the space lanes, this habitat is the secret and exclusive province of space pirates and black marketeers. It mounts no navigational beacons, has no outgoing communications broadcasts, and carefully conceals itself from law-abiding eyes. Even the most determined efforts of private citizens and the Star Patrol have failed to discover this blot upon the galaxy.
Suddenly, something claiming to be Blackside Station sent a Mayday request.

Hooks
1. Heroic characters of the Star Patrol would be ordered to proceed to the location of the request for help, render aid, and then arrest all the pirates in sight.
2. Every planetary government or corporation that had anything stolen by pirates ever is hiring mercenaries to proceed to the origin of the broadcast, recover the stolen goods, and then possibly render aid. Any character party with their own vessel has their pick of contracts. Any character party without their own vessel can negotiate the use of one for this mission.

Act I: Approach

As the PC's approach the location of the distress signal, they will see multiple ships travelling in opposite vectors. (That is, away from the beacon.) These ships are readily identifiable as pirate vessels. The pirates are more interested in running from something than fighting.

If the PC's try to engage the pirate vessels, the pirates will try to evade first, then fire back at the PC's chasing them while continuing to flee Blackside Station.

PC's attempting to pass themselves off as pirates may do so using a combination of Bluff, Intimidate and Knowledge: Streetwise. (PC's in Star Patrol ships face substantial penalties to their Bluff checks, but with a success may pass themselves off as pirates in a disguised vessel or Star Patrolmen on the take.) Success in this deception allows the PC's to gain the following information:
1. There's a lightning monster loose on the station! No way are we going back there!
2. The Bloody Red Hands of Death gang is stripping the station before they go. The heck with that -- can't spend it sucking vacuum!
3. The Straw Hats sold us out! They're the ones who broadcast the signal. Not that it's safe to go back to Blackside anyway...
Failure means the PC's are discovered: the pirates involved will signal their name and description to all and sundry, then try to evade the PC's.

As the PC's approach Blackside Station, they see it is a rotating wheel design with a docking core in the center and docking hubs on the "top" and "bottom" of the station. The bottom of the station has ships docked there identifiable as ships of the Bloody Red Hands of Death gang. The bottom of the station also has a set of laser cannons that open up with a slow and inaccurate, but steady fire.
PC's can attempt to pass themselves off as pirates again, while making Pilot skill checks to evade the lasers. Success in this deception gets a curt instruction to "Dock on the top and don't get in our way." The PC's may also get the name of some gang leaders. Failure means they get shot at until they give up and dock at the top.

Act II: Enter the Station
As the PC's dock, they are met by a panicked man with a Panama hat pulled down low over his eyes and the brim tied down over his ears. He doesn't really care if the PC's are pirates or not: he rapidly explains there's a "lightning monster" loose on the station, that it "jumps out of power conduits and zaps people", but he's safe because the "straw of my hat insulates my head and keeps it from zapping my brain". PC's with any electrical knowledge may be confused by the man's faith in the protective power of woven straw.
Their concerns will be well founded as suddenly a giant spark leaps six feet from a power conduit, obliterates the man in the straw hat, skips off a PC (doing moderate damage), and grounds itself back into the airlock. A few moments later another flash from the PC's ship indicates the party is now stuck: the lightning monsters passage has welded the docking clamps to the ships hull: getting loose will require cutting the clamps free of either the hull or the station -- not possible without a shipyard.
Attempts to get the ship loose will only attract the attention of the lightning monster, which will inquisitively skip out of power conduits, strike a PC (doing moderate damage), and ground back into a conduit...or jump into the ship and damage the electrical systems on board, then jump back out. It should be obvious quickly that the PC's are going to need to deal with the lightning monster before they do anything else.
Xenobiology checks reveal the following:
1. The monster is electrical in nature.
2. The monster is not deliberately hostile, just curious about changes in the magnetic field of the station (caused by people adding bits to it by docking a ship or taking bits away, say, by stripping the station.)
3. Like an amoeba, the monster has a nucleus and a peripheral field. The field regenerates in the presence of the nucleus, but will dissipate without it. The nucleus is the core of the monster.

Repair, Craft (Electronic) or Knowledge(Physical sciences, especially physics) reveal the following:
1. If the monster is electrical, the nucleus of the monster must be a mass of amps...electrical charge.
2. Those amps could be isolated by physically limiting the circuits they travel in...although the monster can arc through the air, it probably prefers to stay in power conduits.
3. Those amps can be trapped in a capacitor, thereby trapping the monster.
4. The nucleus can be located by finding a spot in the power conduits where electricity arcs farther than it should: the unnaturally high quantity of amps will override the resistance of the power conduit insulators.

Act III: Chase the Lightning
The PC's now have three tasks
1. Find and pin the nucleus of the lightning monster
2. Find or build a large capacitor.
3. Feed the nucleus of the lightning monster into the capacitor.

Task 1 is very simple. The power conduits in the station all have safety zones around them -- pirates are not known for workplace regulation, but they enjoy not being electrocuted as much as anyone else, so they practice some common-sense rules. The safety zones are marked with black and yellow hazard lines and signs reading DANGER: Stand 3 feet distant. All the PC's have to do is follow the power conduits and look for a spot where sparks are flying four or more feet from the conduit. Than indicates a surplus of amps and thus the nucleus location.
Once the party finds the nucleus, they will need to keep it in that specific section of power conduit. This requires physically cutting the conduit out of the station's power network and takes a simple repair or craft: Electric check.

Task 2 will require the party to build an old fashioned capacitor: a Leyden Jar. Designing this takes some materials and a simple craft electric or moderate knowledge physical sciences check.

The materials are: a giant glass tank, water, salt, foil tape, and a steel rod. The party will also need a long section of power conduit to lead the nucleus into the Leyden jar.
Unfortunately, the Bloody Red Hands of Death have stripped most of the materials the party needs from the station.
The party will need to beg, bribe, or intimidate the Bloody Red Hands into giving the things up.
This is a set of Diplomacy, Bluff, or Intimidate challenges with the following modifiers: if the party is passing as pirates, the checks are easier. If the party explains this will stop the lightning monster, the checks are easier. If the party was respectful to the gang members manning the defense batteries, the checks are easier. The Bloody red hands are also big tattoo aficionados: their signature is a bleeding wound tattoed onto the left hand. If the PC's lead negotiator is tattoed himself, they can swap ink stories, making the checks easier. Offering items in barter also makes the checks easier.

Task 3 is very simple, in theory. If the PC's have isolated the nucleus properly and built the Leyden jar properly, all they need to do is get the power conduit close enough to the nucleus to make the nucleus arc into the conduit and down into the Leyden jar. Depending on how clever the PC's were with finding and pinning the nucleus, however, this could involve dragging some heavy power conduit a long way through tight spaces. It also involves taking moderate to heavy damage from peripheral grounding as the nucleus jumps into the cable.

Once the lightning monster is trapped, the PC's are free to cut themselves loose from blackside station in peace, arrest the Bloody Red Hands of Death, or both. The Bloody Red hands of Death would prefer to finish stripping the station and get away with their loot instead of fighting, and will do this if the PC's permit it.

Ingredients:
1. the man in the straw hat: the initial person from the Yellow Hat gang who greets the PC's. He has an exaggerated faith in the power of his straw hat to protect him from lightning.

2. tattooed hand: the membership badge of the Bloody Red Hands of Death gang, and a useful clue about a way to negotiate with them.

3. a fake pirate ship: what the PC's can pretend to be to infiltrate the station (and it's very useful to them)

4. an alien in a jar: trapping the lightning monster in a Leyden Jar capacitor is the solution to the alien problem.

5. foundations of electromagnetic theory: are used to build the Leyden Jar, also to detect the nucleus of the lightning monster.

6. DANGER: Stand 3 feet distant: These warning signs are helpful clues for locating the nucleus of the lightning monster