Poor DM/ Game Advice

[Umbran]

IME life only gets in the way if you let it.

Yeah, well... you might want to think beyond your experience.

I have a player with chronic migraines. There are days when her pain is debilitating, she cannot see properly due to light sensitivity, and can't communicate well due to migraine-induced aphasia. She'd be in major discomfort if she did attend, and if she did she'd not be able to make meaningful contribution, or have any fun.

Another player lives about 45 minutes drive from where we game. In winter, in Massachusetts, there's times when snow and ice make travel dangerous.

Another player is a parent. If his daughter gets the flu, not only should he stay home with his daughter because that's called beign a good parent, I don't want him carrying influenza to others at my table.

I've another player some years ago had to bow out of game, because he got an awesome new job that he loves, but it required him to work weekday evenings, which is our regular play time.

Another player, again some years ago... got brain cancer and died.

I don't think any of these people are "letting" life get in the way. With all this, we generally manage two games a month. But sometimes, life gets in the way, without a whole lot of choice for the player.

 

[billd91]

1. I ran two separate campaigns in the same world, with the second one taking place 80 years after the first one ended. They had very different feels, characters, goals, NPCs, and for the most part geographic area. Just because there was a continuity of history from the first campaign, you cannot convince me, the DM, it was only a single campaign. It wasn't.

2. I am in a game where the DM was previously a player in a homebrew world, and adopted it as his own. As a player in that game, there is no difference if something done in history was written by the DM or done by a PC. We are not playing the same campaign even though we share the same setting.

3. When I was in my teens, our DM ran like 6 days a week, some D&D and some Champions. In both cases it was the same world but multiple groups. We never considered ourselves part of the other campaign. In the superhero there would even be a big yearly crossover event - but it was so special because it was a cross-over and we got to meet all these heroes from other campaigns.

To me "different players, different DM, different characters but a shared continuity" does not make automatically it the same campaign. It could, but does not have to.

As long as you realize you choose to see it that way. Others will see them as the same campaign because they do take place in the same continuity. Neither of you are wrong - you just have to define your perspective to communicate.

 

[Blue]

As long as you realize you choose to see it that way. Others will see them as the same campaign because they do take place in the same continuity. Neither of you are wrong - you just have to define your perspective to communicate.

I disagree. If as a DM I run two separate camapigns, no other person's perception that they are the same campaign holds any weight.

 

[merwins]

It's good to be the GM?
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.
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THERE. ARE. FOUR. LIGHTS!

 

[generic]

Yeah, well... you might want to think beyond your experience.

I have a player with chronic migraines. There are days when her pain is debilitating, she cannot see properly due to light sensitivity, and can't communicate well due to migraine-induced aphasia. She'd be in major discomfort if she did attend, and if she did she'd not be able to make meaningful contribution, or have any fun.

Another player lives about 45 minutes drive from where we game. In winter, in Massachusetts, there's times when snow and ice make travel dangerous.

Another player is a parent. If his daughter gets the flu, not only should he stay home with his daughter because that's called beign a good parent, I don't want him carrying influenza to others at my table.

I've another player some years ago had to bow out of game, because he got an awesome new job that he loves, but it required him to work weekday evenings, which is our regular play time.

Another player, again some years ago... got brain cancer and died.

I don't think any of these people are "letting" life get in the way. With all this, we generally manage two games a month. But sometimes, life gets in the way, without a whole lot of choice for the player.

Such truths deserve to be spoken again and again. Not everyone has the luxury of managing their own lives.

 

[Jd Smith1]

Yeah, well... you might want to think beyond your experience.

I've never been wholly convinced that anything exists beyond my experience.

Another player lives about 45 minutes drive from where we game. In winter, in Massachusetts, there's times when snow and ice make travel dangerous.

Living in Massachusetts is something I have studiously avoided my entire life. I live in Texas, where there is no state income tax, and the weather very seldom interferes with gaming.

Another player is a parent. If his daughter gets the flu, not only should he stay home with his daughter because that's called beign a good parent, I don't want him carrying influenza to others at my table.

Most of my players are parents. One is soon to be a grandparent. On the rare occasions a kids sickness keeps them out, the group games on. But in 17 years it has only happened a couple times. Again, avoiding Massachusetts is a good policy: you don't see as much sickness when its 67 degrees in the dead of winter.

I've another player some years ago had to bow out of game, because he got an awesome new job that he loves, but it required him to work weekday evenings, which is our regular play time.

That's a real problem, but most of my players are management or work in industrial jobs (or both). But I keep a waiting list of suitable applicants so individual losses do not affect the group.

Combat deployments with Reserve components has pulled players from my table, but you fill the gaps and wait for them to return; we've all had Uncle Sugar borrow a year.

Another player, again some years ago... got brain cancer and died.

I had a (former) player murder his wife and eventually kill himself after a stand-off (with hostages). I had already booted him from the group, so it didn't affect our game.

I don't think any of these people are "letting" life get in the way. With all this, we generally manage two games a month. But sometimes, life gets in the way, without a whole lot of choice for the player.

Our group has met weekly since 2002. We generally lose two sessions a year to the holidays.

These same players bowl, golf, competition three-gun shoot (me), and conduct other hobbies on a regular basis.

The key is choosing the right players.

 

[Dausuul]

I've never been wholly convinced that anything exists beyond my experience.

So I see.

 

[Jd Smith1]

Such truths deserve to be spoken again and again. Not everyone has the luxury of managing their own lives.

Really? Who manages them? I'm serious: unless you're in prison, who doesn't manage their own life?

 

[merwins]

Really? Who manages them? I'm serious: unless you're in prison, who doesn't manage their own life?

People with epilepsy. People who get T-boned by drunk drivers. People who get shot because they're in the wrong place at the wrong time. People who suck at building and maintaining social networks. People with areas with low (gaming) populations.

People who don't have all their physical or mental faculties. Honestly... some folks just don't. They're born without the ability to do X or Y or Z, or it requires serious extra effort to take up the slack. They rely on others or mask the relative deficiencies well enough to function, but it's still (not) there.

I still remember the old days when I had unreasonable expectations for my table. Now I just have two: compatible fun and sociability. I can work around almost anything else.

Now, to some extent, you're correct: people sometimes make choices that take them out of the game (usually schedule-related). But the reasons they make those choices may not be under their control.

But I should point out that I've drifted into a completely different conversational direction, only vaguely related to why campaigns die.

 

[Jd Smith1]

People with epilepsy. People who get T-boned by drunk drivers. People who get shot because they're in the wrong place at the wrong time. People who suck at building and maintaining social networks. People with areas with low (gaming) populations.

People who don't have all their physical or mental faculties. Honestly... some folks just don't. They're born without the ability to do X or Y or Z, or it requires serious extra effort to take up the slack. They rely on others or mask the relative deficiencies well enough to function, but it's still (not) there.

I still remember the old days when I had unreasonable expectations for my table. Now I just have two: compatible fun and sociability. I can work around almost anything else.

Now, to some extent, you're correct: people sometimes make choices that take them out of the game (usually schedule-related). But the reasons they make those choices may not be under their control.

But I should point out that I've drifted into a completely different conversational direction, only vaguely related to why campaigns die.

Everyone has bad things happen. How you manage those things is what defines your life.