Scales of War #1 Rescue at Rivenroar (Full)

[Goonalan]

Sketch

Love the 1st draft. Love Freggo, think it's perfect. Same for Kyalia. Funny, I always imagined Viator as short! LOL Personally, I'd like to see even longer, wild hair on Ah-shahran, but that's just me. Kali - can go either way, more predator-like, or more bulky. Not sure on Gorm - cute dog, but I imagined him more gruff. As for Velani - yes, wanted to play down the "breast"plate(s) usually found on fantasy-style women, but she's a bit too butch. Her nose is too big, as are her feet (compare to Kyalia's feet, which look great). Agree on longer sword. I know I said originally no hourglass figure, but maybe a just a bit would bring a little feminity and just the hint of upper curves. Would love to see a crest on the breastplate - nothing specific ([MENTION=16069]Goonalan[/MENTION] - is there a Fallcrest symbol somewhere in your documentation?). Love the boots. Tell your artist thanks!!

I've looked lots of places for a Fallcrest symbol and not found one.

I suggested a shield (coat of arms) with scrollwork and a bit of latin- 'per ardva ad astra', meaning, 'through endeavour to the stars'

Hope that's okay- get back to me either way asap.

I'm sending through comments to the artist tomorrow night.

Cheers PDR

 

[larryfinnjr]

Oh, sure, anything's fine, really. I like the latin choice, too! I'll try to somehow incorporate that notion into Velani's persona.

As to the IC thread - DAMN YOU. Bad guys hiding and grinning inside magic circles of unknown power. Finding the line between ME and VELANI is tough here! I can honestly see Velani 1) valiantly charging headlong into that thing, ignoring the potential danger, 2) carefully skulking around the western edge, in an effort to ensure nothing's coming from THERE, or 3) staying right were she is and calling to the troops to come in and help. GAH.

 

[Thanee]

Maybe Velani could make a Perception check to notice...

[SBLOCK=to Goonalan]...that the Ghoul has obviously healed quite a bit in there.

Yeah, yeah, those Health Bars again... but since it was almost "dead" before, there might be something visible. [/SBLOCK]

Bye
Thanee

 

[Thanee]

All of which is to say, I think the artist pretty much nailed Ah-shahran.

Good!

So, those wings in the pictures are ornamental? Aha, didn't know that.

Bye
Thanee

 

[Goonalan]

Maybe Velani could make a Perception check to notice...

[SBLOCK=to Goonalan]...that the Ghoul has obviously healed quite a bit in there.

Yeah, yeah, those Health Bars again... but since it was almost "dead" before, there might be something visible. [/SBLOCK]

Bye
Thanee

I had considered that, however then I also considered Velani's passive perception score of 10... There's actually more to see, if someone gets closer (Velani is 25 feet away), and they have a better passive perception.

Cheers PDR

 

[Thanee]

When my turn comes around, Kyalia will surely head for the doors.

Bye
Thanee

 

[tiornys]

Good!

So, those wings in the pictures are ornamental? Aha, didn't know that.

Bye
Thanee

Heh, I didn't either until your comment made me pay more attention to the pictures. Then I had to go read the full entry to figure out why they had wings, when I knew there was no mention of wings in their Physical Qualities entry. The clothing comments are at the end of the Playing a Deva section.

[MENTION=83060]RavenBlackthorne[/MENTION], I think I managed to fool the die roller

t~

 

[RavenBlackthorne]

[MENTION=17633]tiornys[/MENTION] thank you!! My first hit in combat! Obviously for my next turn feel free to blow my Fey Step or Transport Self to get me out of there please!

As for the art work I'm very impressed! The detail is fantastic. I only really want to comment on Viator: I think he's great but would love to see him look a little more boyish - at first glance he looked quite old in the face. Also, his feet look a little big for his dainty body! I also love the static but wont mind if theres a few less in the next draft. And I can see that the orb is crystal shaped in the plan behind him. I'm also ok with that.

Im back Sun (just in time for this battle to be over!) so normal scheduling shall resume. Sorry for disrupting and thank you to all who have taken over

PS. Kali is devastating in this battle!

 

[Goonalan]

Sent all of your comments (about your PCs) to the artist yesterday evening, awaiting reply.

Will keep you informed.

Thanks PDR

 

[Goonalan]

And here are the four updated characters-

second pass

I'm very happy with Magnus and Kali... over to Larry and Raven?