Nah you're fine. Here's some thoughts.
On your points one through three, provided that tech was barred from the table I'd choose to lead by example. The use of names from the real world allows players some feel of familiarity when so much of a fantasy setting can take away from immersion, and when tech is not at the table you need some form of reference material or you run the risk of having to retcon too much after a bad decision and otherwise ruin the experience of what could have been a good night.
On your points four and five there's a logic bomb present. If the book isn't open then we either have a DM that doesn't need the names list or doesn't need the book in the first place and the argument is moot. Same with if he or she has trouble deciding. No reference either online or paper based is going to help that soul.
My reason for initially posting a defense of the names list was simply to provide the majority online forum community with a friendly reminder that not everyone who plays the game is tech literate or wants to google things. If you don't prep well, your players go on a tangent and you don't have a name handy.. the reference could be handy.
My personal opinion is that it's a call back to an earlier era where such references were widely printed and included in rulebooks. I'd not use it and I agree that for me it's a waste of space; but I can't get behind the "speak with your wallet" and "it lowers the value of the book" partly because I know how hard it is to make money on books, partly because if I bitch about 20 bucks for a book, I'd have to seriously curtail my coffee habit or be a hypocrite, and mostly because I've been buying D&D stuff since the mid-eighties and no matter what I've bought it's always been a partial rip off. Never mind the fact that there's probably at least 20 pages of every rule book I own that I've never read.
Thanks for reading.
The Boots