The "Favorite Simpsons Quotes" thread.

[TracerBullet42]

Lisa: I'm not a state, I'm a monster! *starts crying*
Homer: No, Lisa. The only monster here is the gambling monster that has enslaved your mother. I call him Gamblor, and we must save her from his neon claws!

I've always wanted to stat out "Gamblor" and have him be a BBEG...

 

[Hypersmurf]

I've always wanted to stat out "Gamblor" and have him be a BBEG...

Kamikaze Midget was looking for a BBEG to represent "Greed" in this thread...

-Hyp.

 

[TracerBullet42]

Kamikaze Midget was looking for a BBEG to represent "Greed" in this thread...

-Hyp.

That's just crazy enough to work. I think he/she should go for it. Although there is very little to base it on, other than some neon claw attacks...

 

[mojo1701]

Homer: Lisa, everyone knows vampires are make believe, just like elves, gremlins and eskimos.

Homer: Oh, Lisa, you and your stories. Bart is a vampire. Beer kills brain cells.

 

[MarauderX]

[see sig]

Also love the Clockwork Orange and other Stanley Kubrick references.

 

[Lady Mer]

What, no Sideshow Bob quotes yet? He's one of my favorites!

Parole Board lady: "What about that tatoo on your chest, doesn't it say 'Die Bart, die'?"
Bob: "No, that's German for, 'The Bart, the.'"
Parole Board lady: "Oh! No one who speaks German could be an evil man!"

Bart: "You have such a beautiful voice. Would you sing the entire score to the HMS Pinafore?"
Bob: 'Very well Bart. I shall send you to Heaven before I send you to Hell!"

Bob: "Darn it Bob, there were plenty of brand-new bombs, but no, you had to go for that retro 50's charm."

Bob: "Rakes. My old archnemisis."
Bart: "I thought I was your archnemisis."
Bob: "I have a life outside of you, Bart."

Bob: "You do know I used to have a…problem with…trying to kill people."
Cecil: "Goodness, I had no idea! For you see, I have been on Mars for the last decade, in a cave, with my eyes shut and my fingers in my ears."
Bob: "Touché, Cecil."

Bob "The truth? You can't handle the truth. No truth-handler, you! Bah! I deride your truth-handling abilities!"

 

[Barendd Nobeard]

"That's my retirement grease!" - Groundskeeper Willie

Grandpa Simpson walks into the Social Security Office: "I'm old. Gimme, gimme, gimme!!"

Grandpa Simpson on Social Security: "I didn't earn it; I don't need it, but if they miss one payement I'll raise hell!"

There are many sound files here.

 

[Villano]

Forgot this one from the Halloween episode where Homer was abducted by aliens:

Homer: Please don't kill me! I have a wife and kids! Go kill them!

 

[garyh]

I've always wanted to stat out "Gamblor" and have him be a BBEG...

Ya know, maybe we could use Gamblor as a deity over in Living Enworld.

 

[garyh]

EDIT: I've been caught by the neon claws of Lagor, king of double-posting!