The Fine Art of Quitting a Bad Game

[Stalker0]

My only suggestion is to be straight up about it.

One thing I always worry about as a dm as is that people secretly aren't having fun and are just playing because I'm their friend or they don't have the guts to tell me.

It may sting if a player tells me he doesn't like my game, but I would prefer believing that the people who are still in the game really like it then having a bunch of people just worried about hurting my feelings.

 

[ForceUser]

"I'm sorry, but I'm not having fun in this game."

Yep. Life's too short.

 

[Stalker0]

People seemed to be dismissive about the whole money thing, but that's not really that bad.

At a game, the players play, but the DM works. Now the DM can have fun as well, but the DM has to put far more energy into the game than the players ever will. Especially in a group where only 1 or 2 people are willing ot DM, I don't think its bad to ask for a few dollars to compensate you for your hard work. Or...at least buy the DM's dinner.

 

[ForceUser]

I don't think its bad to ask for a few dollars to compensate you for your hard work.

I do. DMs aren't held to a professional standard, and as we all know, talent, taste and maturity vary wildly from DM to DM. If there was a Dungeon Master's Guild, sponsored by the RPGA with a certification process and credentials whose members were annually recertified as meeting the highest standards of the organization, then maybe DMs would deserve a salary for their efforts.

But there isn't, and they don't, and don't ever let some jackass fatbeard living in his mom's basement tell you any different. I've been DMing since 1987. I don't have to do it; I do it because I love it--I love telling a story, I love directing the flow of play, I love designing adventures and playing monsters, and I love being the center of attention. Inside every DM is a little attention whore yearning to be appreciated for their efforts, and that is why we do it. Dinner once in a while, occasional gifts, a few bucks for gas money now and then--there's nothing wrong with any of that. But the instant your DM starts soliciting dollars for doing what he does, pick up your dice bag, say "Thanks anyway," and be on your merry way.

 

[Glyfair]

Sidetracking: I agree - it's very aggravating for the DM to be expected to have deep pockets in addition to running the game (a discussion I recently had with a couple of my own players). The problem with setting up a game fund is this: Who owns the stuff? Who is responsible for taking care of it, making sure it gets to the game session, and so forth? Gaming groups break up, people move, college starts/ends, etc. So who gets to take what? If it all ends up being owned by the DM, that's the same as paying the DM.

This is something that's largely up to the group. I don't expect this to be a common experience, and probably would be handled differently by each group. I don't think it's necessarily bad for it to be the DM's in some situations.

Most of the time I've seen any discussions of this it has been a somewhat insular group. The group has been gaming together for a while, and the group has stability. Stuff bought is group stuff, but if someone were to move away, it stays with the group. I'd imagine if the group broke up it would be the DMs stuff, unless some players had attachments to it.

One thing to remember is that with most groups where this happens, the DM is the only DM. Everyone else just plays. Otherwise the other DMs would typically would be spending on some of these things and have them available to the group. The other players wouldn't be the one's using the stuff once the group breaks up.

 

[Glyfair]

I do. DMs aren't held to a professional standard, and as we all know, talent, taste and maturity vary wildly from DM to DM. If there was a Dungeon Master's Guild, sponsored by the RPGA with a certification process and credentials whose members were annually recertified as meeting the highest standards of the organization, then maybe DMs would deserve a salary for their efforts.

I'm not going to be saying DMs should be charging for what they do. However, I wouldn't necessarily object to a DM charging. I think this argument is off the mark.

There are lots of things I spend money on that don't have a "professional standard." When it snows kids go from door to door offering to shovel people's sidewalks. Since they aren't held to a professional standard and their talent, taste and maturity vary does that mean they shouldn't be paid? Nonsense.

I think such a thing should be treated just the same as anything you pay for. Are you getting enough of it to pay for it? Are there options that are better?

I know I'd be willing to pay an amount if I knew I had a great gamesmaster. If I didn't have a good experience, then I wouldn't pay. If I knew I could get in a game that's better and free (or at least less expensive), then I wouldn't pay.

Obviously, in this case the experience isn't good. It's not a situation where you'd be paying. However, if I had a chance to play in game run by someone with a good reputation that charges, I Would consider paying.

 

[ForceUser]

I'm not going to be saying DMs should be charging for what they do. However, I wouldn't necessarily object to a DM charging. I think this argument is off the mark.

There are lots of things I spend money on that don't have a "professional standard." When it snows kids go from door to door offering to shovel people's sidewalks. Since they aren't held to a professional standard and their talent, taste and maturity vary does that mean they shouldn't be paid? Nonsense.

I think such a thing should be treated just the same as anything you pay for. Are you getting enough of it to pay for it? Are there options that are better?

I know I'd be willing to pay an amount if I knew I had a great gamesmaster. If I didn't have a good experience, then I wouldn't pay. If I knew I could get in a game that's better and free (or at least less expensive), then I wouldn't pay.

Obviously, in this case the experience isn't good. It's not a situation where you'd be paying. However, if I had a chance to play in game run by someone with a good reputation that charges, I Would consider paying.

We're going to have to agree to disagree, then. Paying money to play in someone's game fundamentally alters the gaming relationship from an informal, friendly environment of leisurely enjoyment to a more formal business relationship where each side has financial expectations of the other--players will expect to get their money's worth for their entertainment, and DM will expect to get paid. This pollutes the spirit of fellowship crucial to a fun roleplaying environment. No way. Don't pay.

 

[Tsillanabor]

Wow-I've never even considered charging to DM. I have on occasion had to tell a player to buy his own supplement if I don't want to buy it-with the caveat that I need to approve anything used from it.

 

[jmucchiello]

We're going to have to agree to disagree, then. Paying money to play in someone's game fundamentally alters the gaming relationship from an informal, friendly environment of leisurely enjoyment to a more formal business relationship where each side has financial expectations of the other--players will expect to get their money's worth for their entertainment, and DM will expect to get paid. This pollutes the spirit of fellowship crucial to a fun roleplaying environment. No way. Don't pay.

Exactly. In fact, since you are dissatisfied with the service, you should ask for your money back. I'm not really serious but truly if you are paying for a service, you should either get your money's worth or get a refund. Somehow I doubt this DM would see it that way.

 

[Glyfair]

We're going to have to agree to disagree, then. Paying money to play in someone's game fundamentally alters the gaming relationship from an informal, friendly environment of leisurely enjoyment to a more formal business relationship where each side has financial expectations of the other--players will expect to get their money's worth for their entertainment, and DM will expect to get paid. This pollutes the spirit of fellowship crucial to a fun roleplaying environment. No way. Don't pay.

I can see that, but that's a personal decision based on your own POV, not an absolute.

I see the same arguments on bridge teams. Some championship bridge players play for the challenge, and choose the best players on their team. Some choose their teams based on friendship. Some get paid to pay on the team by a sponsor (Bill Gates, for example, has a top pro as his regular partner). Many do all of the above.

Their are a lot of casual bridge players who feels it breaks the spirit of the game to pay for a partner or teammates. On the other hand, most sponsors feel it gives them the best play experience to pay for the best. They can focus on their own game instead of having to worry about their partner's own weaknesses. They can play against the best and do well enough that they can learn from it.

Are any wrong for how they choose to play the game? I don't think so (at least among the variations above). If you feel it would cheapen the experience to pay someone to run a game don't. But don't begrudge those who would do so and those who would pay to have a better experience.