“Now continuing on to our third quarterfinal match of the CR 2 edition of the Tournament of Champions! This match features the best of the Lawful Neutral forces against the best of the Chaotic Neutral forces.”
Making his way into the arena and starting at position 60N0E, this combatant measures 7 feet tall and weighs 300 pounds. He has a record of zero wins, zero losses, and one draw in the main battle, avoiding a loss to Neutral’s former Hall of Famer phase wasp in a brilliant display of tactics. He hails from the Positive Energy Plane. Representing the forces of Lawful Neutral, please welcome the lumi Luuuuuuuuuuumiere!”
Lumiere enters to the polite applause of the Lawful Neutral faction of the audience. He is brilliantly armored in half-plate and wielding a morningstar. Actually, the armor is not brilliant, but Lumiere himself is, as his body glows between the joints of his armor. His serene expression gives nothing away, although you would think he would appear shocked because his glowing head floats a few inches above his body.
“And now making his way into the arena and starting at position 60N115E, this combatant measures 4 feet nine inches tall and weighs 97 pounds. He has a record of one win, one loss, and zero draws in the main battle. In a brilliant display of courage, he defeated Neutral’s huge centipede and almost notched a victory against a phantom fungus. Representing the forces of Chaotic Neutral, please welcome the satyr Piiiiiiiiip the Piiiiiiiiiipeless!”
The hoots and hollers of the Chaotic Neutral faction welcome Pip the Pipeless’s entrance. Barechested, but not muscular, the chestnut-haired satyr stands on powerful goat legs and rubs one of his curved black horns with his stubby fingers. He has a shortbow strapped to his back, a quiver at his side, and a mug of ale as big as his arm in his hand. He drinks the whole mug in one gulp, then hefts the shortbow.
Psybo communicates telepathically to the two combatants. “Pip, you will have initiative in the first round unless the Chaotic Neutral representative tells me otherwise.”
Ding Ding! Round 1!