TURTLEDOME!: Battle Bone (DM: KenHood, Judge: Lord S.)

[weldon]

"Now that most of us are here," he says with a significant look out the window, where Emral chats to himself, "and I've had a moments reflection, I'm willing to offer your group 1000 pieces of gold for those origami rats."

Finnian starts choking on the hors d'oeuvres that he just picked up off the tray.

Endurance Check (1d20+7=15)

He just barely manages to get the food dislodged and quickly finds a cloth napkin. He looks around for a moment, but finding no obvious solution, he casts a pleading look at Annie and then stuffs the cloth in a pocket.

Did I hear that right?

 

[KenHood]

May I? he asks the mage.

"Certainly," says Swillwort, "They're a little dry, having been in the humidor for a couple of years, but still incomparable. After all, its a long-filler cigar with a Colorado Claro wrapper from the sunniest slopes of Elysium, hand-rolled on the thighs of celestial virgins. The size is known as the Doddoddod*--note it's unusually large dimensions, a testament to that famed gourmand's prodigious appetites."

Did I hear that right?

"Yes, you did."

"Annie," says Swillwort, his voice rising at the end of the word, "Leave that poor gentleman alone and bring a small chest of gold for my new friends."

*Fun Fact: The Doddoddod is the Transitive Isles equivalent of the Churchill.

[sblock=Read Only if You Make a DC 15 Streetwise Check]A single cigar is probably worth more than the entire party's possessions--and the possessions of their relatives, both close and distant. In fact, its value is comparable to that of a baby eladrin of noble blood sold on the black market. (I hear they're in high demand of late.)

Even if you did take a few of them, you'd NEVER find anyone who could afford to purchase one. They're just that expensive.

However, smoking one gives you a +5 bonus to Impressing the Elite skill checks.[/sblock]

 

[weldon]

Finnian stares happily at the ceiling while the conversation about money continues on around him, completely oblivious to any subtleties or nuance of expression.

Streetwise Check (1d20+1=2)

[sblock=OOC]I wasn't going to post the roll, but I thought the fumble on the check was worth a laugh[/sblock]

 

[Reklaw]

Drivan reaches carefully into the humidor and pulls out one of the exquisite cigars, holding it over his shoulder for a second for Annie to clip before lighting it with a carefully controlled flaming thumb. Pulling the smoke into his mouth he blows out a series of small circles.

"Marvelous cigar Obadiah, I'm sure the story of how you got these is almost as good as the cigars themselves!"

[sblock=Streetwise]Natural 20 Forgot to add the 1 from charisma mod, sure thats fine though? [/sblock]

 

[fireinthedust]

[sblock=drat] 1d20+4=11 Soooo.... bah, missed it by 1! And it's probably something interesting Emral would want to know![/sblock]


Emral takes a long puff on the cigar, then blows a smoke ring through the air. Something niggles at the back of Emral's mind, but the thought fades like the smoke. Wow. This is nice, thank you so much! A thousand gold is very generous. What I'm curious about is whether we can find some sort of... advantage in the arena, before we get there. I mean, we're going to be fighting the Legion of Bone, and... well, my powers have changed, so there's more uncertainty for me about the outcome than there used to be. Any advice or what have you, would be very welcome.

 

[KenHood]

[sblock=Finnian's Streetwise Check]It's a little known fact that cigars are made from banana leaves, composted with manure. You should tell everyone. Immediately.[/sblock]

Drivan reaches carefully into the humidor and pulls out one of the exquisite cigars, holding it over his shoulder for a second for Annie to clip...

"Annie," says Swillwort, "Scat!"

"Yessir. Immediately, sir." She leaves the room.

"Marvelous cigar Obadiah, I'm sure the story of how you got these is almost as good as the cigars themselves!"

"Heh! Indeed. It involves a priest, a succubus, and a tear in the spacetime continuum.... Heh-heh!" He drifts off into a reverie. A smile on his lips.

"Oh! Oh my goodness!" says Marco, fanning himself, a bit flush, after puffing his cigar, "This is an exquisite...I just...dear me! My father would die for one of these..."

Swillwort shakes his head, returning to his senses. "Hmm? Please. Be my guest, my dear halfling. Take the entire box."

"Really?!"

"Indeed. I can always get more."

What I'm curious about is whether we can find some sort of... advantage in the arena, before we get there. I mean, we're going to be fighting the Legion of Bone, and...[/color]

"Sorry, my friend," says Swillwort, "Combat is not my area of expertise. I'm more of an artificer and scholar."

[sblock=Arcana DC 15]Waitasecond!

You know this guy, too.

Obadiah Swillwort, renowned creator of the Multi-Purpose Widget of Utility, designer of the Orb of Blast Bifurcation, and the Vorpal Wand of Incomprehensible Obliteration--among other things.

This guy is good.[/sblock]

"However, I do believe I can provide you with a small device that may aid your group."

"Annie! While you're back there, bring my Wand of Unrestrained Mass Destruction."

"Yessir!"

 

[Reklaw]

[sblock=Arcana Check]Damnit... 13 [/sblock]

Drivan looks a little sad to see Annie leave but his eyes widen slightly upon hearing Obadiah's request.

 

[fireinthedust]

[sblock=Arcana Check] 1d20+5=13... so that's a no? [/sblock]


Emral thinks to himself for a moment as Swillwort sends Annie off to get his W(and of unrestrained)MD. huh. I feel like I should know what he's talking about. wand, wand, wand... I know what those are... oh, yeah, wands, I knew an enchantress in school who liked wands... wait, hey! cigars, wands, sounds like a limerick. This guy's mind is in the gutter! Artificer my fiery... wow this is a good cigar. I wonder why my clothes never catch on fire. Wait, people are talking again, better pay attention. Say something smart, fast.
Wow, that's fantastic! I never thought I'd see one of those. Really an honor meeting one of the greats. This whole retirement community is just full of the most fascinating people, I should have come here for training! Do you accept students?

[sblock=bluff check] Oh, I hope this works, or he'll think Emral is being a twat! 1d20+9=24 FFFffffffeeeeew! [/sblock]

 

[mohalloran]

Having plopped herself down onto the ground, Vaunea finds herself drifting in and out of sleep. Every so often she will hear mention of wands and cigars, neither of which interest her. Quietly, she wonders to herself if there was ever a great warrior in this town who stood more than 4 feet tall.

Drifting off to sleep again, Vaunea dreams of her upcoming battle with the Legion of Bone. Suddenly, the room hears a startling sound as Vaunea leaves the room. She re-enters holding the poster that the drawing was on.

"Got writing thing? Vaunea need write."

 

[KenHood]

Do you accept students?

"No."

"Got writing thing? Vaunea need write."

"Certainly. Look in the desk, over there."

"So, with regards to the rats... Are you willing to accept my offer?"