I’ve been struggling with DM fatigue the last several months, and feeling guilty because of it. It’s nice to hear I’m not alone. Here are some of the factors in my fatigue:
-the loss of the player(s) I’m closest to: A few years ago I started up an AL style game at our local library, in great part because my daughter, my son, and I were itching to play more D&D. My daughter was already busy with work and the last year or two of high school, and was only able to be there intermittently—especially after the first year. But my son was younger and there almost every week. He helped the newbies, was my walking rules encyclopedia, my porter for our gear, my listening ear as I planned and debriefed, my backup DM when I couldn’t be there. D&D is an important way we connect. Then he got old enough to get a part time job; one of his assigned shifts is over the time of the library game. Between the library’s open hours and my schedule, there wasn’t a way to move the game. So the game continues, but without either of my kids, except on rare occasion.
-not knowing until game time if we’ll have enough people to play. We only have 3 remaining regular players; we can make it work if 2 show up, but I often don’t know until I’m there if that will happen. Some of that is a lack of consideration, but a lot of it can’t be helped. 2 of the players are high schoolers, the other in their first year of community college. They don’t know until close to play time if they have homework for the next day. And other things come up. Right now one of them has cheerleading practice; a couple of years ago it was pep band that made a hash of the winter schedule. The uncertainly makes it hard for me to feel motivated to prep. (And the fact that there are so many weeks we don’t play probably makes it harder for the players to prioritize coming when it does work.)
-a genre shift in the adventure. I’m running TOA, and they are now in the tomb. The tomb is more horror oriented than I comfortable with, unlike much of the rest of the adventure. And far more traps and puzzle oriented (and one of my remaining player hates puzzles). Its nature also means I have to be familiar with a far wider range of rooms/encounters during a given session: I’m finding I’m frequently reading the room for the first time in session. In part because i don’t know which way they are going to head in the dungeon ahead of time and in part because the fatigue means I’m less excited to prep.
A few months ago I learned about an AL game in our area, which has given me a chance to play. (And, about half the time, my son comes, too! My daughter likely would, but she’s away at college.) Last time I was there I allowed myself to be roped into DMing because we had too many tier 1 players for 1 table. I ran a module I’d run a few years ago, with a table of middle school boys, all but two of whom were complete newbies, and even the “experienced” ones weren’t very. I had a blast. So the fatigue at the moment seems to be mostly with a particular game, not DMing per se. I’d still rather play at the AL games than DM, but I’m willing to pinch hit as needed. Which reminds me. Today is AL game day. I have some prep to do, just in case!
