TURTLEDOME!: Battle Bone (DM: KenHood, Judge: Lord S.)

[mohalloran]

[sblock=ooc]Sorry all. I don't know what's been going on. I kept trying to get on a post all week, so far, but I kept getting errors. One was even a database error. Fun, huh?

Anyway, I'm back. I had to go to Engaged Encounter last weekend and forgot to inform everyone. Don't hate me......[/sblock]

Vaunea, very confused, notices the halfling stumble at the end of his sentence. "Need O? What O? Where get O? Vaunea want potions. O potion good!"

Vaunea trys to read the potion recipe over Mikey. However, her inability to read well gets in her way.

 

[KenHood]

In the Library

[sblock=Drivan Only]Meanwhile, back at the library...
[sblock=Badgermen]

Just a side note, I didn't happen to run across any information on the Badgermen during my research that could help her out did I?

It might interest you to know that Kellog's named a cereal after what Drivan discovered about the Badgermen. It's called...

Nut N' Honey!​

*Ba dum ching!*

Thank you! Good night! Be sure to tip your waitress![/sblock]

Smiling, surprised at his apparent charm, Drivan agrees, "Sounds like a good idea!" He stands up, ready to follow the half-elf, "Oh, and by the way, my name is Drivan... Who do I have the pleasure of meeting?"

She smiles, showing perfect, white teeth. "Olivia. And I assure you, the pleasure is mine."

She takes your arm. Her body is warm. Her hair smells of apple blossoms.

"Here. It's right this way."

Olivia makes small-talk as she escorts you to the TURTLEDOME! archive. It's a winding path through the library, into an older section. "Just through that door..."

As you open the door for her, she smiles and blushes. "Such a gentleman!"

Then, she shoves you hard.

You realize that you're in alley, with two hulking brutes: a massive half-orc and a scarred goliath.

The goliath grabs at you. [Action: Grab, +2 for Combat Advantage (1d20+6+2=25)]

The half-orc smacks you in the head with the flat of a massive axe that trails glowing streamers of blood and makes a weird keening noise. [Action: Attack v. AC - Axe, with Combat Advantage (1d20+8+2=21, 1d12+3=9) - 9 DAMAGE]

---

Roll for Initiative, please! [/sblock]

[sblock=Dude!]If a hot chick shows interest in your character, always, always, ALWAYS make an Insight check.[/sblock]

 

[KenHood]

In the Tavern

[sblock=Emral and Hadarai Only]Hadarai does not answer the door, so Emral spends the evening with company of rather friendly brandy.

The next morning...

Emral wakes up at the hanged man, sits up, and promptly rubs his head for the pain. Blasted tavern, putting headache juice in my tankard! he curses, and crawls out from under his room's bed.

Emral puts his clothes on, then stomps down the stairs to the common room. Looking as pale as a flaming-ash-covered-man can, he waves at the room's occupants (if any, or not) and mutters to himself. blastedeladrinandhisstupidhairmakingmecomeallthewaytothis stupid tavern to get him to come join the team so he can be friends with Marco again so my stupid "vision me from the future" doesn't ...mumblemumblerhubardrhubarbrhubarb

He orders a pint of coffee from the bar, then thinks of something and grins into his drink. Hey there, adventurers! I have a quest! Down by the docks is an old man who stinks of ale; y'know, the guy by that boat? He's leaving soon, getting it ready, as he's in a big hurry to go. He sent me to find some brave souls willing to travel right this second, to find a fire elemental, one made of blue flame he can trap in an item and sell. Lots of danger, I hear the island he plans to go to is filled with warrior women of the scantily-clad variety. If they find strong adventurers to use to breed better warriors, those men may never leave the island!

[sblock=bluff check!]

1d20+9=12 I suggest IMHO that there should be a situational modifier because the people at the Hanged Man tavern are actively looking for an adventure to go on.

Yeah. Yeah. *Poof* You get a +1 bonus on the roll.[/sblock]
Several pairs of eyes share furtive looks, then there is a rush for the door. A gnome illusionist is trampled.

Other adventurers crowd Emral. They shout...

• "How much is the job worth?"
• "Do we get experience for bedding the Amazons or do we have to kill them?"
• "Do you know any clerics?! We need a leader in our party!"
• "As an enlightened female adventurer, I find Amazonian stereotypes to be demeaning and objectifying to women."
• "How do you know this?"

Then, there is a loud *click*.

All the adventurers surrounding Emral silence in an instant.

Emral finds a massive walnut-handled, blue-steeled double-crossbow is placed against his temple.

The crossbow is held in the left hand of an angry looking man with a large, heroic chin. The right hand of this man has been replaced with a huge, serrated sword.

"Well, aren't you Mister Fancy Pants," the big-chinned man says, his voice dripping with sarcasm, "working up a whole bunch of noobs with promise of a job that don't exist. Give me one good reason why I shouldn't add some ventilation to that matchstick you call a skull?"

"Nah. Make that TWO good reasons."[/sblock]

 

[KenHood]

In the Alchemy Lab

[sblock=Hey, Mo!]

Sorry all. I don't know what's been going on. I kept trying to get on a post all week, so far, but I kept getting errors. One was even a database error. Fun, huh?

Yep. I got that database error, too. Talk about a bit of a scare!

Anyway, I'm back. I had to go to Engaged Encounter last weekend and forgot to inform everyone. Don't hate me......

It's okay. I hate you for entirely different reasons.

Wait.

I shouldn't have typed that last part.[/sblock]

[sblock=Vaunea and Finnian Only]

Vaunea, very confused, notices the halfling stumble at the end of his sentence. "Need O? What O? Where get O? Vaunea want potions. O potion good!"

Vaunea's question interrupts Uncle Mikey in middle of a mini-concert, during which he whistles off-pitch and plays percussion on his metal nose. He stops and grins. "Yeah. Potions are ****** AWESOME! Huh-huh."

Vaunea trys to read the potion recipe over Mikey. However, her inability to read well gets in her way.

Vaunea notices there is a lot of writing in the book--and not the kind created by a scribe or printing press. There are crabbed notes in the margins, which turn into large 'helter-skelter' notes over the actual text, which are covered by childlike scrawls in crayon with drawings of people's naughty bits.

Uncle Mikey pulls the book away and crushes it against his chest. "Heeeeeey! You look with your hands, not with your ey--no--it's...uh...yeah...It's like you look with your eyes, not with...wait...don't even look at all. It's like totally secret with magic stuff that would completely blow your mind and like expand your horizons, but in a horrible way that involves your like brain exploding."

"Uh...OVER the horizon."

"Yeah."

He pauses for a moment, and then turns his head away from you, lifts up his metal nose, and picks out a booger. The noise that accompanies the act is wet and squishy and somewhat swamplike, but otherwise defies description.

"Anyway. There's like this dude that lives down the road, and he's got like this...uh...ingredient that I need for my super-mega-awesome-instant-healing potions. But he's like a total ***** and won't even sell 'em to me, because I didn't like pay him or something stupid like that. So, when I like went to pick it myself, 'cause it grows on a bush, and you know, nature is free, man. Nature deserves to be free, you know? I mean, who can like put a price on stuff that grows on a tree? Everybody is always sayin' that money don't grow on trees, so how you can like charge money for something that grows on a tree? And why would you put two big ****** dogs in the yard with bush? That's totally ***** up, right? So, yeah, if you could like get that ***** for me, I could make some bad-**** potions."[/sblock]

 

[fireinthedust]

[sblock=Emral/Hadarai]"Well, aren't you Mister Fancy Pants,"[/sblock][sblock=Emral/Hadarai] the big-chinned man says, his voice dripping with sarcasm, "working up a whole bunch of noobs with promise of a job that don't exist. Give me one good reason why I shouldn't add some ventilation to that matchstick you call a skull?"

"Nah. Make that TWO good reasons."[/sblock]

[sblock=Kenhood & Hadarai] Emral felt the tip of the bolt poking into his temple, and the smug voice of (the Genasi decided his name) "Mr Hero-Chin" goading him on. Crossbow to the temple when I'm not looking, eh? Bet you paid some good money for it, probably been around adventuring for a while, probably how you lost the ability to play the harp. Means you know when a man's got something up his sleeve. The words come as Emral looks straight ahead, a determined look on his face. The look of someone who knows that to back down an inch would be asking a bully like sword-chin-guy to pull the trigger. The kind of look someone who's been bullied before gives, when they figured out how to dig in their heels and play the same game right back at them: half madness, half suicide, all pushed on a wave of equal parts adrenaline and stupidity. Likely you're thinking of how easy it would be to shoot some noob in the head, see if he's got lit charcoal in his brain like he's got in his mouth. But then something in the back of your mind starts looking at all the weapons in this room, and telling you that anyone who'd shuck jive at a room like this is either stupid... or doesn't have a problem with a problem. Then you're looking at me and remembering how Genasi explode when people hit them. You're looking at your crossbow and wondering if you fire will it screw up your other hand? Then you're thinking about all those posters you've been seeing around town, about those adventurers taking on the Legion of Bone at the [color-green]TURTLEDOME![/color]this week, and how one of them is a fire genasi. You're thinking maybe this is the same guy. Maybe he knows what he's doing. Maybe if he can take on an army of skeletons he can take a crossbow bolt to the head. Or maybe he's one of those teleporting sorcerers, and the second you shoot that bolt he'll be gone. Maybe. If you're lucky.
This was it, Emral thought. Give it all you got.
Emral turned his head to face the soldier-of-fortune, staring him in the eye with a half-mad grin screwing up his face. So I have to ask you. Do you feel lucky? Well? Do ya?[/sblock]

 

[fireinthedust]

[sblock=Intimidate Check to save my life]1d20+9=28 Wooooo!

I posted before I rolled, as I didn't want to lose the writing. Check the number! If you don't believe me, check with Invisible Castle, get my IP or whatever, that is a 100% legitimate roll! Bam! [/sblock]

 

[Reklaw]

[sblock=Kenhood]Nice... I figured the library was a safe place... lol Will remember the insight check from now on!

Initiative check=6...

Can I use an action point or anything like that to get out of a grab? What roll do you want me to make? Assuming I can take no action until I get out of the grab right? If I cast an AoE spell with me at the center does it damage me?
[/sblock]
[sblock=Drivan's Stats]Drivan Aslemar - Human Wizard 1
Passive Perception 11, Passive Insight 16
AC 16, Fort 13, Reflex 14, Will 14
HP 13/22, Bloodied 11, Surge Value 5, Surges 6/6
Speed 6, Initiative +0
Action Points: 1, Second Wind
At-Will Powers: Magic Missile, Ray of Frost, Scorching Burst
Encounter Powers: Force Orb
Daily Powers: Sleep
Cantrips: Ghost Sound, Light, Mage Hand, Prestidigitation
[/sblock]

 

[Lord Sessadore]

[sblock=On Ata]Just dropping a note to say that I haven't heard anything from Ata in the various other threads I share with him since his last flurry of posts saying his internet was hopefully fixed ... so maybe his internet is not fixed.

Also - nice job on using the flirty half-elf-lady to lure the wizard into a grappling match in an alley [/sblock]

 

[weldon]

[sblock=Back!]Tried to get in on Sunday night, but apparently ran into a site outage. I spent some time at lunch catching up on the thread and I'll post more later tonight.

Ken, I didn't know that I could use a full-size weapon in my off-hand. I thought I had to take the two blade fighting style instead of beast mastery to do that.[/sblock]
Finnian is a bit befuddled as he listens to Uncle Mikey explain about the unresolvable tension between nature and capitalism, but he clearly likes the friendly halfling and agrees to help...

I suppose it wouldn't hurt to grab a leaf off a bush, right Vann? Where do you need us to go again?

 

[mohalloran]

"Vaunea get bush. Or plant. Make Mikey happy. Where live? Who live?"

Vaunea gets the information on where the "dude" lives and heads out the door, hopefully with Finnian.

"Mikey protect book. Funny. Just words. No special words. Axe make head explode. Words not. But Mikey likes it."

[sblock=KenHood]Well, good. As long as you have a completely rational reasoning for hating me, then we won't have a problem. [/sblock]