D&D General An Immodest Proposal: That's What the Bard Says!

[payn]

 

[Staffan]

Bards are awesome, particularly when you're the experienced player among a bunch of newbies (or at least newbies to 5e). It's great at supporting other players and making them shine, such as when a well-placed dissonant whispers not only deals its own damage but also lets the fighter and the rogue get an opportunity attack off, with the rogue getting sneak attack damage on that attack.

 

[bedir than]

DEREK!!!!!

 

[Lanefan]

Actual in-game dialogue from Yorick the Depressed Jester, as best I can remember it:

Lundgren: Ouch, a natural 1 on your death save. It's not looking good for Dante (female elf rogue).

Players: Yorick, it's your turn. Use Healing Word to save her! [general nagging ensues]

Yorick the Depressed Jester: Eh, what's the point? Everyone dies eventually.

[general bedlam from the other players. I'm cracking up]

Yorick the Depressed Jester (eventually): Fine. But it probably won't make much difference. And don't blame me if your life is all downhill from here.

Sounds like Yorick is the second coming of Winnie the Pooh's Eeyore. Love it!

(oh, and point your player in the direction of the movie "Christopher Robin" for an Eeyore primer...)

 

[Clint_L]

Sounds like Yorick is the second coming of Winnie the Pooh's Eeyore. Love it!

(oh, and point your player in the direction of the movie "Christopher Robin" for an Eeyore primer...)

Great suggestion - he's a newbie player but a drama kid, and he's way more into selling his character than learning the rules of D&D, so it makes his character super entertaining, if frustrating for some of the others players...which just makes his schtick work even better.

 

[fuindordm]

• Bards beat up the wizard and stole her stuff. "Learning the innermost secrets of the universe to unlock ultimate cosmic power? Why should only smart people get to do that?" Yoink!
• Bards bullied the cleric into giving up their stuff. "C'mon, no one wants to be like you because you just sit there healing everyone else. If you teach me, then everyone will think you're cool." Psych!
• One bard college (Swords) even skeezed off the fighter by stealing battlemaster maneuvers. I shudder to think what closed-door shenanigans led to THAT violation. The battlemaster stumbled out of the room a few hours later clutching his niche, but it was too late to ask the bard to use protection.

 

[Staffan]

• Bards beat up the wizard and stole her stuff. "Learning the innermost secrets of the universe to unlock ultimate cosmic power? Why should only smart people get to do that?" Yoink!