D&D vs. Real Life

[PugioilAudacio]

In D&D my cleric has a wisdom of 18.

In Real Life, I've had to pay locksmiths to come unlock my car door.

In D&D, my rogue can crack the hardest of safes with ease.

In Real Life, I've had to pay locksmiths to come unlock my car door.

 

[PugioilAudacio]

In fantasy games, I spend all day sitting at a desk in a prison-like school.

In Real Life, I am an all-powerful wizard. The world is mine to command! I have slain dragons with a gesture, overturned nations with a word!



Actually, the only reason I play fantasy games is because my DM has this awsome system set up called ENWorld. The rest is just grueling torture.

 

[Thornir Alekeg]

In D&D I can adventure in a dungeon for days, and when I emerge, my faithful steed will still be there waiting for me.

I real life I can go to the movies for two hours, and when I emerge, the my trusty can is stripped or stolen.


I D&D I can pick complex locks with ease!

In real life I cannot get those damn twist-ties off of my kids' new toys!

 

[Mystery Man]

In D&D I can use "find the path", "locate object", "augury", and "divination" to find and learn anything about any subject I need to find and learn about.


I real life I have to have the locksmith come out and re-key my car for 60 dollars and pay the dealership another 80 to have the key-codes reinputted into the anti-theft system. Then find the original key while cleaning my basement 3 days later.

*sob*

 

[Savage Wombat]

In D&D I'll keep fighting my way to the end of the dungeon, even if I'm down to 3 HP and my last 4 pts. of STR.

In real life I'll call in sick because I've got a bad sinus headache.

 

[LordVyreth]

In D&D, my wizard spends weeks pondering the intricacies of thick, complicated tomes, then writes up dozens of pages of strange descriptions written in an odd, indecipherable terminology that 99% of the population wouldn't understand or think is evil and unnatural, and spending every bit of money he has to purchase components to make these writings work or enhance their effectiveness, just so he could gain power and the ability to create and control reality as he desires.

In real life, I'm the DM, so nothing changes really.

 

[dreaded_beast]

In DND I am Chaotic Good
In RL I am Neutral

In DND I can carry around a greatsword, dagger, longbow and arrows, and wear a chain shirt while travelling from town to town.
In RL I can't carry a nail clipper on an airplane.

 

[derelictjay]

In D&D I love to play a bard

In real life I can clear a room with my singing (I'm did it once)

 

[Richards]

In real life, there's not much danger of an armed commoner losing a fight to the death with a housecat.

In D&D, put your money on the cat.

Johnathan

 

[Kalendraf]

In D&D, ignorant villagers call upon the players' heroes to burn the local witches and warlocks along with their occult tomes, not realizing they are actually just kind, intelligent, but misunderstood characters.

In RL, ignorant anti-D&D zealots call upon anyone that will listen to burn the player's books and lock away the players, not realizing they are actually just kind, intelligent but misunderstood people.


In D&D, anyone rising up and attempting to slay their evil oppressive masters is considered heroic.

In RL, it's called "Going Postal" and carries a sentence.


In D&D, the ability to secretly keep an eye on others with scrying is typically used to gather information to plot against your enemies.

In RL, the ability to secretly keep an eye on others with hidden cameras is typically called voyeurism.