2 kids and Wife finished introduction. My bro in law and friend opted to join at the DM guide/2nd part portion. Youngest kid wasn't interested. 1 less, not too bad.
Is it me or do some of these monsters do some insane damage?
According to Red Box rules, Gray Wolves get +7 v AC, 1d6+5 and free shift 4 squares. Monster Manual is still +7 v AC, but only 1d6+2. Not +5, no free shifting around.
Thats one example. A few others had just some very off damages. I got to the point I had to just fudge attacks to not murder everyone out of the gate.
Hmmmmmm. Well, the original MM1 monsters simply proved to be underpowered. Low level monsters were often OK, but you'd find pretty quickly as levels go up that many monsters just became bricks, and DMs had to use level+5 or more monsters just to get out some damage and be a threat, which are then hard to hit, had lots more hit points, etc. Starting with MM3 WotC revised the standards for damage output and some other numbers, reduced hit points for solos somewhat, etc. The result is what you see. An MM1 wolf might do 1d6+2, which is an average of 5.5 damage per hit. The MM3/MV version does 1d6+5, which is 8.5 per hit. The standard is now level+8 average damage per hit. Monsters with the Brute role do between 25 and 40% more, and 'limited' attacks (IE recharge/encounter attacks) generally do about 50% more damage than at-wills. This is all somewhat subjective of course, a limited attack with a wide area of effect (like an Area 3 at 10 squares say) probably won't have boosted damage because it will likely hit several PCs at once. In any case ideally level+8 is the baseline, though a few low level monsters do less.
It has been noted that, especially at low level, there are a few monsters that even though they follow the guidelines are extra deadly. Most of those have been revised either with errata or by republishing in MV with modified stats. You're always well-advised to use the newest iteration of any monster you can find, they generally work better.
As for ultra-deadliness.... Hmmmmm, not sure why you say that. Your average wizard (about the lowest hit point class) has Constitution plus 10 hit points. This means the minimum is 18 at level 1, and 4 more/level thereafter. So, your average wizard can stand up to 2-3 wolf bites, and probably more considering Second Wind and leader healing if things get bad. Generally if the wolf is chewing on the wizard for the 4+ rounds needed to finish him off something went badly wrong!
Remember too, said 8 CON 18 hit point wizard has 5 healing surges, worth 4 hit points each. Even if he gets gnawed to an inch of his life and has no cleric around he can recover all 18 hit points in a short rest (though he'll be left with no more surges). Most players will choose to start with a 10 or a 12 CON, so in reality even a wizard would typically have 6-7 surges and start with 20-22 hit points (surge value 5), so a 12 CON wizard has 22 hit points, 7 surges, and each is worth 5 points, so he can completely recover all his hit points, plus about 50%, being able to absorb 57 damage over a whole day in theory. In practice most of his healing will have leader bonuses, which for clerics are often something like 6 or more points, meaning our redoubtable 12 CON wizard will probably survive a day where he takes 80 damage total! 22 points delivered rapidly in a bad situation can still kill him quite easily, but you will find that most groups are pretty tough and can take a couple of fairly stiff hits without it being a crisis.
A fighter starts with 15 + CON, and usually CON is a higher priority, so 30+ hit points are not unusual at level 1, with 10+ surges, each worth 7, maybe even 8 points. Obviously fighters get chewed on a lot, but again, its going to take 3-4 wolf bites to even make him sweat.
