Sir or Madam

[STARP_JVP]

Anybody on this forum who is a fellow Aussie may have heard about the happenings at Parliament, where security guards were asked to stop calling people 'mate'. This isn't a political thread but that point leads on to my question, which is: do you mind if people call you a familial name? Obviously non-Australians won't get called 'mate' by a stranger very often, but they will get called 'buddy', 'chief', 'pally', 'squire', 'dude' and so on. A lot is made of how people use these familial terms instead of calling people 'sir' or 'madam'. I guess I'm asking if anybody here is like me and doesn't like to be called 'sir', or 'madam' if you're a lady.

It's just a personal thing, but I find 'sir' to be sycophantic. To me it implies a level of respect I don't deserve, and it's also disingenuous because it's never used in the right context. It's supposed to be used to show you respect a person, but in my experienced it's used to make it look like you respect a person when you couldn't care less about them. To me it's a buzzword - a pointless pleasantary. I feel uncomfortable when waiters use it, for example. I just want my dinner quickly and efficiently - beyond that, I neither want or expect to be treated like a better.

Am I alone here in that a) I don't mind being addressed familiarly by strangers (within reason) and that b) I don't like being called 'sir'. Please tell me I'm not - everyone thinks I'm weird.

 

[Darth K'Trava]

I thought "mate" was the stereotypical Aussie "title" that I've heard... but then I blame Crocodile Dundee for that...

 

[mojo1701]

I thought "mate" was the stereotypical Aussie "title" that I've heard... but then I blame Crocodile Dundee for that...

I blame almost everything on Crocodile Dundee.

 

[Templetroll]

I live in NC, USA and have worked behind a counter in a deli where the customers would address me as 'sir'. Here, there is nothing pointless about being pleasant or polite; it's the way most of the people just do things. Note, 'most' does not mean 'all' mate.

 

[Lucky Number]

Call me by the job.

I prefer Reverend, my name, or "you"; and being addressed familiarly by strangers or people i've only recently been introduced to tends to throw me off. I'm never sure whether it's appropriate to respond in kind, and i've heard from many people who get very annoyed at being spoken to in this manner. Oddly enough, they're mostly people working in the service industry. You'd think a little kindness (even insincere kindness) would be appreciated.

I understand that some shopkeepers in Japan will use the adress form "-sama", usually reserved for dieties and rulers. It's quite a bit more sycophantic than "sir", certainly.

 

[mojo1701]

being addressed familiarly by strangers or people i've only recently been introduced to tends to throw me off. I'm never sure whether it's appropriate to respond in kind, and i've heard from many people who get very annoyed at being spoken to in this manner.

That it does. I was at the gym one time, and I just brushed past a guy, and he said, "How (are) you doing, chief?"

All I could think was, "Whoa."

 

[Darkness]

I'm not picky in English.

In my native language, German, I generally won't object if a stranger is addressing me casually unless the stranger in question is in the process of doing something I frown upon (e.g., asking me for money so they can finance their drug addiction, aggressively blocking my way to pester me with some cause or other, mistreating those who can't fight back, or otherwise being inappropriately disruptive/aggressive toward whomever).
Further, I'll almost never object to a stranger addressing me formally. I think I've done it once - ever.

 

[Aust Diamondew]

I prefer a non-familial name by people I don't know. Mister and you are what I feel most comfortable with strangers calling me. If it's someone I am an acquaintance of I feel comfortable being called by my name.
I don't feel most people should call be 'Sir' because I'm neither their senior or their superior (and most people don't call me Sir). But unless it's offensive I pretty much don't let how people address me bother me.

I remember when I first moved to Pennsylvania when I was 14 (I'd lived in Virginia for the previous 10 years) and I called my new social studies teacher 'Sir' he got really pissed and said 'we aren't in a freaking military academy' (he was a British man too don't know if that means anything). Alot of the students also made fun of me for refering to teachers as 'Sir' or 'Ma'am'. It really pissed me off, since then Pennsylvanias have proven to me that most of them aren't s who don't give a damn about respect, they're just a little different in how they address people.
I still call my teachers sir and ma'am.

 

[Kemrain]

Pronouns

I hate being called Sir. My dad is sir. My granddad is sir. A Colonel is sir. I'm.. "You," or "kid," or even "son."

I prefer non-gendered pronouns, personally, but that's my whole other problems. I get called "Miss" a lot at work, too. It's the hair. I find I mind "Miss" much less than "Sir." ...Or "Son," for that matter.

- Kemrain the Ambiguous.

 

[Psionicist]

Heh, I've been calling people mates for as long as I remember ("Here you go mate", "Hope it fixes your computer, mate", "I hear you, mate") without thinking about it too much. Probably because I don't really care what other people call me. Except for a salesman who insisted on calling me Rambo on a vacation in Spain a few years ago, that's was annoying.