The "I Didn't Comment in Another Thread" Thread

[Alzrius]

That's not an issue with the concept of triggering, it is an issue with people being lazily ignorant.

And if you tell someone that they're ignorant, then that's "making it personal."

Some people on the Internet really get triggered by that.

 

[Bedrockgames]

He wanted to be able to pay for a career as a jazz musician and doing a one-off pop album seemed like a great idea. It definitely paid off financially, but it wildly derailed his artistic life and not in a way he's been happy about. He's a serious musician who will be remembered for a novelty song that was just supposed to be a goof.

I was joking Whizbang

 

[el-remmen]

I think we have adopted far too many terms from therapy and applied them casually to society and culture.

I think there can be problems with this, obvi. But also, naming things helps us to identify and discuss them. And while they can get overused in colloquial conversation (how many times have I heard someone call their very reasonable desire for things to be tidy, "OCD?") in the contexts in which they matter they still are helpful. Even if they are just used to pose a diagnostic question, "Could I have PTSD from that car accident? I should talk to my doctor. . ."

All that said, where I find this infiltration of diagnostic and psychological language most annoying is in period movies/tv where it would make no sense for characters to discuss things - for example - in Freudian terms, but nevertheless do and get away with it because that kind of talk is so deeply embedded in the discourse.

I remember once on the TV show Vikings someone described one of Ragnar's wives colloquially "a nymphomaniac" and it really took me out of it. Couldn't they have just said "She likes sex a lot?" or some Norse expression the context or narrative would explain?

I know that this is a nitpick but knowing it is doesn't make it not ring discordantly in my head when I come across it.

 

[trappedslider]

Hush everyone The council of Snorlax is in session.

 

[Snarf Zagyg]

Sure. But have you thought about the actual lyrics?

So - you are broke, homeless, alone, and may be taken to court, but dude, you are such a drag, we need you to lighten up! A person who has good reason to feel bad is being told their feelings on the matter are not acceptable.

Consider that in the context of someone who is bad off and already having moments of suicidal ideation....

Yes, I have. I think that the song is annoying (mostly because it was overplayed), but I don't think it's toxic positivity.

If someone is having moments of suicidal ideation, then they should probably see a licensed health care professional and discuss medication options, and their issue is not going to be that particular song.

Like, my wife has complex PTSD. I know what "triggering" actually means, I have seen it happen. I know the impact of it. It isn't used properly by most people. That's not an issue with the concept of triggering, it is an issue with people being lazily ignorant.

And this gets to the crux of the issue I have. If you are speaking to someone (for example, someone with PTSD) and you begin to talk about something that is bad for them or that is triggering, then that person will tell you. At that point, normal rules of civility mean that you, being a not-jerk, will change the subject.

The problem is that this isn't what's usually happening. As you do correctly note, a lot of these terms are just borrowed terms that are being thrown around with all of the grace of manhole covers, and usually incorrectly. More importantly, while it is important to know your audience, you can't expect a person to self-censor their speech to take into account all the possible individual issues that any person reading (or listening) might have.

You can't use satire, because some people won't get it.
You can't ask for civility, because then you're tone policing.
You can't talk about a range of topics, because someone might be triggered.
You can't look for a silver lining in a complicated topic, because that would be toxic positivity.
You can't disagree with someone, because that would be gaslighting.

....and so on. I think that civility is always a good thing, more often than not the use of these phrases does nothing to add to conversations and usually is just an attempt to shut down people. Which can be done with substance.

 

[overgeeked]

You can't look for a silver lining in a complicated topic, because that would be toxic positivity.

And that's the bit that started this tangent. Looking for even the slightest positive aspects of a generally negative situation being called out as toxic positivity.

 

[Bedrockgames]

If someone is having moments of suicidal ideation, then they should probably see a licensed health care professional and discuss medication options, and their issue is not going to be that particular song.

I remember the whole Better by you, Better than Me lawsuit. I think it is definitely unwise to pin something like that on a song (you can never predict how someone is going to respond to art)

 

[Ryujin]

I think we have adopted far too many terms from therapy and applied them casually to society and culture. Some of these terms work well in the context of ongoing therapy sessions, but the way we flippantly label things with this kind of language, I think it doesn't usually diagnose what is really going on

Probably comes from people who read all of those self help books written by people who are living garbage lives, but can definitely tell YOU how to live well, by spouting a ton of high falutin' words they don't understand, themselves.

 

[Snarf Zagyg]

Probably comes from people who read all of those self help books written by people who are living garbage lives, but can definitely tell YOU how to live well, by spouting a ton of high falutin' words they don't understand, themselves.

My advice is far too good for me to follow!

 

[Deset Gled]

I think there can be problems with this, obvi. But also, naming things helps us to identify and discuss them. And while they can get overused in colloquial conversation (how many times have I heard someone call their very reasonable desire for things to be tidy, "OCD?") in the contexts in which they matter they still are helpful. Even if they are just used to pose a diagnostic question, "Could I have PTSD from that car accident? I should talk to my doctor. . ."

Yes, for as much as people complain about the overuse of terms, like "OMG, I'm so OCD about my coffee", there's an argument to be made that it's actually a positive shift in attitude towards mental health. If I had to pick between OCD (as a random example) being stigmatized and not talked about or publicly discussed and occasionally used frivolously, I'll take the latter.

Normalizing mental health issues means people will talk about it normally. And metaphors and hyperbole are part of normal speech.