D&D 5E And the award for "Best Improvised Weapon" goes to....

[Stormonu]

Bowl of noodles + animate rope = one very confused BBEG

Not sure if this counts, but had a Druid with a Dire Bear companion that was spider-climbing shoulder-drop an enemy below it, from a distance of mere 10 feet. With the Dire bear weighing several tons, by 3E rules that was a 20d6 shoulder drop.

Drop bear indeed.

 

[Levistus's_Leviathan]

An ogre using a goblin as a club to pummel the PCs.

I had a Goliath PC use a halfling PC to bludgeon some goblin raiders to death, so pretty much the inverse of that scenario.

 

[toucanbuzz]

Femur bone from the lich's own throne.

Prior edition (Pathfinder/3.5), so the setup isn't current, but it was an epic 40 round combat involving multiple rooms, ups and downs, and then the finale. Atrophied lich (basically one that has lost a lot of its spellcasting over the years) had permanently paralyzed all but 1 PC, an "inquisitor." Liches back then had a nasty defense: ignore the first 15 points of damage unless it was done by a magical AND blunt weapon. All the PC player had was pointy stuff. She wore a ring that protected her from being paralyzed and they'd run the lich out of spells (no unlimited cantrips back then). But, still, it was wearing her down with physical attacks, and she wasn't doing enough damage even with magically enhanced strength. The lich was able to do some minor healing in lieu of an attack, and the math wasn't on her side. Eventually, its healing would outpace the minor damage she could do. It was looking grim.

She looked around for a blunt weapon, but there were none in sight. She asked if she could break one of the bones off his bone throne to use as a weapon. I said sure. She risked the round and got a solid femur bone. She knew her class had a special ability to temporarily make any weapon she was wielding magical. And it was blunt. And she had 1 use of that ability left. We rolled in full sight, no DM help here. She got a few hits in. The lich got a few hits in. Both were on fumes. The lich's self heal couldn't keep pace if the PC hit. So then the combat came down to whoever hit next...

Well, as you can guess from the tag line, after 2 intense rounds of neither striking, she rolled the magic number. And down went an epic enemy in an epic battle, done it by his own bone throne.

 

[Fenris-77]

The halfling theif. Who made a far better club than one might think.

 

[Stormonu]

The halfling theif. Who made a far better club than one might think.

Swinging halflings like clubs and chucking dwarves into enemy battlelines. It’s what D&D is about.

 

[Undrave]

Nothing specific I can think of from D&D but I do have one from Mutant & Mastermind

The crew and I were chasing a Mastermind who had some sort of water manipulation device and was flooding the concrete building we were in while they were in a deep diving suit with built in protection. They had hidden themselves in a control room one floor above us and were controlling blast doors and stuff to block us off and potentially drown us.

My character was in an alternate form that granted him super strength, wall crawling, but also a digging speed I specifically calibrated to go through concrete. So I break through the concrete ceiling and climb into the control room, surpising the Mastermind… Then I grabbed hold of them and used THEM as a blunt instrument to destroy the control computer before they could complete whatever plan they were working on!

It worked pretty well.

 

[Fanaelialae]

Back in 3e, a friend of mine ran a campaign where we all played giants. One special maneuver that giants could do was to pick up smaller creatures and wield them as weapons.

At one point early in the campaign we were ambushed by Drow slavers, so I grabbed one of them and tried to slam him into the others. However, I rolled a fumble which resulted in weapon breakage...

 

[MarkB]

Wow, "smaller character" is really coming out top of the list so far.

 

[Voadam]

I had fun as a high potence (super strength) vampire in a vampire the masquerade game.

It is a bit of a terrible story and not for the squeamish.

I was playing an enforcer character and another PC came to me saying he had crossed powerful political vampires and was being hunted with a death bounty and needed to flee and get them off his back. We talked it over and planned to frame his death with me taking a picture of him staked, then ripping his hands off while he was staked so he would not feel it and passing them on to the vampires with the magic gloves he wore and saying I left him for the sun.

His hands would grow back with enough blood and he could skip town.

I improvised a stake by ripping out one of those long thin iron fence posts with a sharp end and skewering him.

Queue us learning that stakes need to be wooden to paralyze a vampire. Otherwise they just hurt, a lot. And require frenzy checks for the intense pain to not go berserk.

New improvised back up plan, I carried around a baseball bat as my tool of choice, and it was wood. A bit thicker than most stakes, but with enough force you can make it work.

The more you know.

 

[Oofta]

A familiar thrown into the face of the bad guy. Of course the reason I remember it is because of all the jokes about using the feline as a catapult.

It was mostly done as a distraction, but having a cat stuck to your face can't be a lot of fun.