I think we agree in that.Best way to make it work is to know your players. If they are CharOpers, you count for that in encounter design or you just don't play with them if you don't like that play style. As a DM, you sit down with people, they tell you what they want, you tell them what you want, discuss how to make it work for mutual satisfaction. If you can't find common ground, too bad, but there are different games so you all pick up something else that meshes better with everyone.
I also think we both think trying to “break the game” is a sucky attitude to play.
I think the difference is, I’m saying “3x is great if you don’t allow sucky play styles, here’s some things I avoid“. (I suppose if you like what I think is “sucky” - sure why not - you do you.)
But I think what you’re saying is 3x can be made to suck, therefore 3x as a whole sucks. I heartily disagree with that possible strawman (though “3x sucks, 5e rulez” is a common sentiment here).
I think any RPG can be made sucky by an attitude of trying to “break“ it, but every version of D&D can be sublime if done right (for you).