Halfling Rapper 25 Cent

[Old Gumphrey]

Ok, my new character is a halfling bard/pimp/thug/rapper named 25 cent. He's got Leadership, which means he's got a right hand man and 10 of his boys from halfling country representin'. They roll out in a huge wagon pulled by 6 war dogs. The wagon is armor plated with steel and has steel alloy wheels with spinner rims. He fights with a repeating crossbow held sideways with rapid reload and archery feats.

When my crew isn't busting caps in you with their sideways crossbows, they're playing my wicked system, which has the biggest bass drum known to man riding in back along with plenty of doped-ass sound effects and percussion. This is to back me up while I freestyle rap in combat to boost my allies while I peel your cap back with a cannonball. You can hear my rolling up from a mile away, the is off the MF'n CHAIN, G, off tha HOOK.

I'm gonna pretty much go straight bard to get as much magic and music as possible. My spells, flaws and extra feats are twinking the BULL out of the repeater crossbow, I'll get 2 shots a round at level 6 for around +11/3d6+5 a shot. Does anyone know of any good PrC's that involve leading a gang of iced-out balled-up thug killers across the countryside for mayhem and profit? I wanted to modify the dread pirate and call it the dread gangbanger, but I also want to improve my ability to bust raps and spit lyrics in addition to leading thugs and busting caps.

 

[blargney the second]

Wow. You should really talk to backbeat.

 

[Old Gumphrey]

I usually rap over a backbeat, I don't really talk to it.

...

 

[hackmastergeneral]

Go, go go go
go go go go go halfling
Its yo birthday
We gonna party like its yo birthday
We gonna sip ale like its yo birthday

You can find me in the inn, bottle full of sin
Look mami I got the X if you into taking drugs
I'm into having sex, I ain't into making love
So come give me a hug if you into to getting rubbed

When I pull out up front, you see the wagon on dubs
When I roll 20 halflings deep, it's 20 daggers in the club
Halflings heard heard I with Elminster, now they wanna show me love
When you sell like Bilbo, and the halfling hoes they wanna
But halfie ain't nothing change hold down, G's up
I see Frodo in the Cutt that halfling roll that leaf up
If you watch how I move you'll mistake me for a fighter or an imp
Been hit wit a few bolts but I dont walk wit a limp
In the Shire then the ladies saying "25 you the man"
They like me, I want them to love me like they love Sam (wise)
But holla in South Farthing them halflings'll tell ya im loco
And the plan is to put the rap game in a choke hold
I'm feelin' focused man, my money on my mind
I got platinums out the deal and I'm still on the grind
Now halfie said she feeling my style, she feeling my flow
Her girlfriend wanna get bi and they ready to go

 

[awayfarer]

Hmm, instead of "25-Cent", how about "Two Bits"?

 

[Drowbane]

Fitty coppers?

Ok, my new character is a halfling bard/pimp/thug/rapper named 25 cent. He's got Leadership, which means he's got a right hand man and 10 of his boys from halfling country representin'. They roll out in a huge wagon pulled by 6 war dogs. The wagon is armor plated with steel and has steel alloy wheels with spinner rims. He fights with a repeating crossbow held sideways with rapid reload and archery feats.

When my crew isn't busting caps in you with their sideways crossbows, they're playing my wicked system, which has the biggest bass drum known to man riding in back along with plenty of doped-ass sound effects and percussion. This is to back me up while I freestyle rap in combat to boost my allies while I peel your cap back with a cannonball. You can hear my rolling up from a mile away, the is off the MF'n CHAIN, G, off tha HOOK.

I'm gonna pretty much go straight bard to get as much magic and music as possible. My spells, flaws and extra feats are twinking the BULL out of the repeater crossbow, I'll get 2 shots a round at level 6 for around +11/3d6+5 a shot. Does anyone know of any good PrC's that involve leading a gang of iced-out balled-up thug killers across the countryside for mayhem and profit? I wanted to modify the dread pirate and call it the dread gangbanger, but I also want to improve my ability to bust raps and spit lyrics in addition to leading thugs and busting caps.

put down the halfling-leaf and back away slowly!!

 

[Nifft]

1/ "Two Bits" seems less anachronistic -- and also, it's a good excuse to mention how Halflings get a +1 bonus with "tha two bullets in ma sling, baby".

1b/ Are you from the South Side of Shirecago? Or are you from South Central Los Archons?

1c/ Do you offer to show lasses "how hairy my one foot really is"?


2/ Crossbow Sniper (PHB-II) -- add half Dex to xbow damage. Pimp!

3/ Improved Unarmed Strike, and (from ToB:Bo9S) consider Superior Unarmed Strike, so you can pimp-slap.

4/ Consider a level of Warblade (ToB:Bo9S) or six. White Raven has some pimp-tastic Stances for buffin' your entourage -- Bolstering Voice gives them a +2 to Will saves (+4 vs. Fear) and Leading the Charge gives them a significant damage bonus when they bum rush the NPC Widda Attitude who throwin' you shade. Also, you will then qualify for Song of the White Raven, which will boost your Inspire Courage effect.

Cheers, -- N

 

[findar]

Go with "Two Bits". "Two bits, yo" is easier to say than "25 cents, yo"

I had a player play a gnome wizard that talked like a rapper. Since there weren't a lot of other gnomes around, everyone just thought that was the way gnomes spoke in Common.

 

[Darklone]

Could you show us how your pimp pimped the pimpbows damage? I assume Crossbow Sniper is already included... Flame Arrow? E-subbed Flame Arrow (cold, acid, lightning, force, dudeness)? Poison? Coolness damage bonus?

 

[Old Gumphrey]

1/ "Two Bits" seems less anachronistic -- and also, it's a good excuse to mention how Halflings get a +1 bonus with "tha two bullets in ma sling, baby".

1b/ Are you from the South Side of Shirecago? Or are you from South Central Los Archons?

1c/ Do you offer to show lasses "how hairy my one foot really is"?


2/ Crossbow Sniper (PHB-II) -- add half Dex to xbow damage. Pimp!

3/ Improved Unarmed Strike, and (from ToB:Bo9S) consider Superior Unarmed Strike, so you can pimp-slap.

4/ Consider a level of Warblade (ToB:Bo9S) or six. White Raven has some pimp-tastic Stances for buffin' your entourage -- Bolstering Voice gives them a +2 to Will saves (+4 vs. Fear) and Leading the Charge gives them a significant damage bonus when they bum rush the NPC Widda Attitude who throwin' you shade. Also, you will then qualify for Song of the White Raven, which will boost your Inspire Courage effect.

1a: The name is definitely worth considering. Sling is an obvious choice but 25 cent / 2-bit is rather frail with 4 strength (thus ass sling damage) but this twinks nicely with the crossbow spec. He's not real tough but he rules his set with game and skill, not an iron fist.

1b: West Side of Halfling Country, G. He grew up in the Ankheg Fields and got hard protecting him and his momma.

1c: Nah, 25c/2b mainly just pounds out the hoes whenever he feels like it. He doesn't usually even have to ask, they just want it.

2: Check!

3: 4 strength.

4: I haven't heard of this class but it looks radical, I'mma go check it out.

Well on further thought, Rapid Reload makes a repeating crossbow kind of useless. I wanted him to be able to change magazines as a free action, but if he can already reload as a free action there's only style points involved. But since this character is all about style I might have to do it anyway.

Numbers breakdown on damage is 1d6+1+1d6 for a +1 acidic crossbow, with +3 more for crossbow sniper, +1 within 30', and another 1d6 for Sonic Weapon buff out of Spell Compendium. We're rolling with the Recharge Magic Variant so I can keep that buff up basically all day.

What about Two Weapon Fighting and dual wield repeating crossbows?