Okay, I went out to see her last night at work around 9:15. It's 8:50 AM, and I just walked in the door.
Confused? ME TOO.
I go meet her sister so she can lead me to the workplace in question. I take a few opportunities to ask for advice on how to read Alison. I'm told "She's shy, but she opens up after a while." Fair enough.
I sit through several hours of decent angry punk music at the bar, getting maybe two minutes of Alison's time within a half hour. Not a problem. I announce after a while that "I think I'm going to take off," and she says "No no no, stay! Hang around and when I get off work, we'll hang out." I'm desperate for closure, so I hang in there. The word is that lots of her friends and her sister are going back to her place just to hang out later- jokingly called a party. I figure if anything's bound to reveal itself, it'll make its move late in the evening at her house.
As the bar is closing, one by one, people bail out on the "party" plan. As I'm following her to her house I realize that it's only going to be her and her sister there, with me. That's it. I'm unnerved but determined.
In the house, her sister announces that she's leaving immediately, because she has to get back to Brooklyn NY by 11 AM. Fine... now only me and Alison. No one else in the house. This is that odd exciting time when you feel like SOMETHING'S going to happen. I'm not down for any carnal shizz-badooms or anything, but I could go for some light snuggling activities. Alison runs upstairs to sweep her room clear of errant unmentionables- what she'd earlier spoken of: "I've got to go up first and clean out my underwear", which got a big laugh.
So, I'm up there with her in her room. Nice place, great cat named Simba. Cute kitty. We sit (I sit, she lies) on the futon and watch VeggieTales because she swears it's hilarious. I don't find it hilarious, but I sit and laugh at appropriate parts. Afterward, looking at photos on the bed, I get all the "waving-in" signs. I'm no suckah, and I know when someone's trying to meet me halfway when it's time to come down to some first moves. I respond by getting closer and laying back (I really am tired at this point- it's maybe 4 AM). She lies down with her back to me, covered with a blanket. Very defensive posture. I back off. I drift off eventually, so I say that I should go (hoping to get a better view of whatever signal I'm getting). She jumps up and says "Okay, I'll lead you back to Route 37... or did you just want to nap?" Nap?! I groan like I'm tired, because, well, I AM, and say maybe a little napping. She jumps back into bed with back-to-me, and promptly lies perfectly still. I'm confused as all hell. I'm PRETTY sure she's waiting for me to move my next pawn, but what the hell was her acting so glad to have me leave about? I've got red lights and green lights, go, stop, yield, curve ahead, and "bridge out" signs. I make no more plays, and that's how the night goes.
I wake up around 8 with sunlight coming in the room. I get up and silently leave a note saying "Didn't want to wake you. Hope I can find route 37 alright... -Tom!", and leave. I just wanted to get back home, where I understand what's going on.
So, the score remains: no kiss, no hug, no touch, save for the time I shook her hand on Monday as we introduced ourselves. I'm so lost.
It's a day-by-day thing. Anyways, I'm thinking of you.
