[OT] Hey there, Dr. Midnight, what's going on with your love life right now?

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TalonComics said:
Okay, one thing that bothers me is you hiding your stuff. That's just wrong!

You're a paid gaming illustrator and the creator of the D20 Sh*t shirt which makes you a professional in the industry. You have nothing to be ashamed of! Be proud of what you do! If she ends up wanting to get more serious and you've hidden a major part of what you are you're only going to cause problems for yourself later on.
Would you honestly want a serious relationship with someone who didn't respect your profession or your hobbies?

You're right, of course. I don't know that I really want to spend too much time explaining why I hid them, but honestly, there's that damn geek stigma. You can't just say you play D&D and not offer several minutes of righteous justification. I didn't want to waste my time.

I apologize, knowing full well how many times I've mentioned that we have to stand up for D&D as a respectable hobby.
 

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Hey now Doc, you hid the granny-porn too. There ain't nuthin wrong with that neither. Them old ladies deserve love too!

Seriously though, Alison does seem to have some communication/intimacy issues, and having dealt with that sort of thing repeatedly in the past, let her make the next move. If she doesn't call in the next few days (at least to frickin apologize) then don't lose any sleep over it--you probably saved yourself from a lot of serious "drama".

In the interim, drink a beer. Or six. Then put on the tank top and the fuzzy Speedos and yell obscenities at the TV.

Anyway, it's really a win-win situation if you look at it--either she ponies up and shows her cards, or you dodge one hell of a bullet. Right?

(Still happy and fooling myself)
tribe
 



Give her one more chance. But never, ever expect to be able to change someone. You will fail.

If the last chance fails, drop the subject and return to posting gaming-related topics.

Oh, and never, ever take advice from someone not using his real name.
 

A word of warning, Doc:

Veggie Tales is a religious show.

It is a well known fact that D&D and Religion very rarely mix.

Be cautious...

And that Larry Cucumber is creepy...
 


Whatever you do, don't call her again.

Anyways, if you want to avoid the friend trap again, make a move early on in the relationship. You aren't being rude if you do it with class and don't overstep her boundries. A kiss on the cheek, a hug, a look in the eyes. She needs to know that you want a more intimate relationship. If she doesn't want the same thing, no harm no foul.

Another thing. Never do anything that makes you feel unimportant. If you're out to see her, she should be out to see you. If that's not the case, you don't want to be with her anyways.

You will meet other women. Ones that will treat you decently.
 

Wait a minute - if this Veggie Tales is a religious show, then LOOK OUT. This might even have been her version of "dropping by the gaming store."

Doc, I was only casually interesed before, but if this plays out on the religious tangent, then be thee wary. Now I am worried.
 

Ok Dr. M...I know you don't need any more advice, but I can't not give it. Reading this thread has been out-and-out pain :(

1) Don't call this girl. You have (by all appearances) been classed as--at best-- a "friend". This is no place to be. A "friendship" where one friend has romantic interest and the other doesn't is no "friendship" at all.

It's a recipe for disaster.

2) If she calls and you go out with her again, go out for drinks. If this girl is shy, booze will loosen her up (and no, I don't mean that way...I mean liquor will make a shy person talk). You will get your answers. If you're oneof those people who craves "closure" then you should do this.

If she doesn't cal, ican only repeat: don't call her.

3) Move on. I'm serious Doc, don't mope around your house. This is a girl you went on three dates with; dates that (and I'm sorry to point this out) went nowhere.

They went nowhere because she treated you poorly. Sorry, but from your account this is an inarguable truth.

I can see "working" to save a relationship that you have something sunk into, but this is three dates my friend.

Cut your losses now. This girl either doesn't want you as a boyfriend, or is playing a game so arcane that it is impenetrable to someone with fairly straightforward goals.

You should not be too emotionally attached after three dates.

I don't know you Doc, and I won't pretend to. Neither do I know her. But certain things are universal.

This girl is a "player" of some sort, and though I don't know what her game is, I do know that you should stop playing.

Take that for what it's worth and I hope the next girl you meet is a better fit.
 

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